


When Kara Met Lena

by Naralanis



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, F/F, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Humor, Idiots in Love, Sorry Not Sorry, When Harry Met Sally riff, an attempt was made, and let's be honest kara is infinitely better-looking than Billy Crystal, and wanted to put these two in it, i watched it like 34635 times, if you know the movie you know how this is gonna go, no surprises, seriously this would be practically a shot for shot remake of the movie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-05-16
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:53:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 26,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24183184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Naralanis/pseuds/Naralanis
Summary: It was just a drive from university to National City. An 18-hour drive with her friend's admittedly weird girlfriend. Certainly nothing life-changing.
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 23
Kudos: 226





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I had to do it, my brain made me. Yellin' can be done at the tumblr @ naralanis

Lena suppressed her irritation when she slowly rolled up to the curb and there was no sign of Lucy. They had agreed on two o’clock sharp, and it was already five minutes past, thanks to the throngs of students Lena had to drive past at a snail’s pace. Lena was on a tight schedule—she jammed a finger on the button for her hazard lights, ignoring the honks and curses from the other vehicles that now had to swing around her. 

It was typical Lucy. In hindsight, Lena should have scheduled this whole ordeal at least a half-hour earlier; then there would have been no risk. It took a full eight minutes for Lucy to finally make her way out of her apartment building, tugging Lena’s newest road-trip companion by the arm; a tall, muscular blonde woman who carried two heavy-looking duffel bags slung over her shoulder. 

“Finally,” Lena muttered, glaring at her wristwatch as she rolled her window up. “Morning, lovebirds. You’re _late.”_

Lucy giggled. “Sorry, Lena, my watch stopped,” she lied rather atrociously, but Lena decided not to call her out on it, in the interest of time. 

Lena rolled her eyes. “Whatever,” she popped her trunk; it sprung open with a loud click, and Lucy’s girlfriend—Lena had forgotten her name—immediately strolled to the back to divest herself of her cargo. 

Lucy was smiling genially as she draped herself over Lena’s window. “Lena, this is Kara,” she nodded towards the blonde rummaging through Lena’s trunk, trying to make everything fit. Lena popped her head out of the window, giving a little awkward wave as Kara slammed the trunk shut. “Hi.” 

“And Kara, this is Lena,” Lucy continued. “She’ll be your buddy on the trip to National City.” 

Lena rolled her eyes at the word ‘buddy’, but Kara stepped closer and wrapped an arm around Lucy’s waist from behind. The other she stuck through the open window, offering her hand in greeting. 

“Hiya,” she said jovially. “Kara Danvers.” 

“Lena Luthor,” Lena greeted, taking the other girl’s hand in a cordial shake she immediately regretted once she encountered sweat. She wondered if she’d be able to discreetly wipe her hand somewhere. 

“Charmed,” Kara quipped, but her attention was already elsewhere as Lucy practically pinned her against Lena’s car. 

“I’m going to miss you, baby...” 

“I’m going to miss you, too...” 

“Oh, come on,” Lena groaned, wiping her hand on her pants. She tapped her fingers on the steering wheel, trying the ignore the couple currently sucking face while plastered against her vehicle. Honestly. She fiddled with her keys in the ignition, giving them a few moments—Lucy's girlfriend was leaving, after all, it had to be an... emotional moment. 

“I love you...” 

“And I love you too!” 

“No, I love you more!” 

“No, silly, I love you m--” 

“Ahem.” Lena cleared her throat, but the two paid her no mind. Indeed, their embrace became more urgent; Lucy had her fingers entwined in Kara’s hair, while the blonde’s hands seemed to be travelling a downward path to Lucy’s bottom. “ _Ahem.”_

Ignored for a second time, Lena heaved a sigh and slammed on the horn. The two girls jumped, and Lucy looked at her sheepishly while Lena flashed an apologetic smile that was not entirely sincere. 

“Sorry!” she said, opening the door for Kara, who did not look contrite in the least. She took a moment to kiss Lucy once again, and Lena could not help but roll her eyes. 

“Do you want to start the first shift?” Lena asked, motioning to the wheel. 

Kara waved her off as Lucy embraced her again. “Nah, nah, you’re already at the wheel, I’m good,” she said before Lucy dove in for another kiss. 

“I’m going to miss you _so much...”_ Lucy cooed into their kiss as Kara held onto the open car door for balance. “Call me!” 

Kara chuckled, a low rumble in her chest. “I’ll call the minute I get there.” 

Lucy peppered her face with kisses. “Call me from the road.” 

“I’ll call before that.” 

“ _Ahem!”_

The two stopped abruptly, and turned a half-apologetic look towards Lena. Kara laughed, pecking Lucy’s lips one last time before sliding into the passenger seat and slamming the door shut. 

“Off we go,” Lena said through gritted teeth, pulling out as Lucy strolled alongside the car, fingers hooked onto Kara’s for as long as she possibly could with the car at a slow speed. 

“Bye, baby! Bye, Lena! Have a safe trip!” 

“G’bye, babe!” 

“Call me! I love you!” 

“I love you too!” 

Lena breathed a sigh of relief once she was finally able to pull into the city traffic. Kara had been silently rummaging in through the backpack she had on her lap, rifling through what looked to be cassette tapes, a large assortment of pens, and miscellaneous items of clothing, and Lena observed quietly out of the corner of her eye. 

“So...” Lena began, only to be interrupted by a sudden yelp of excitement as Kara pulled out a literal bunch of grapes from some forgotten pocket. 

“Aha!” She waved them in the air triumphantly. “Want a grape?” She bit at one, straight from the bunch before she could receive an answer. 

Lena raised an eyebrow. “No, thank you.” She said, turning her nose. 

Kara shrugged. She chewed silently for a few moments, then turned her head and spat the seeds at the window. They collided with the glass with a loud splat that made Lena’s lips pull into a terse line. 

Kara turned to her with a grin. “I’ll roll down the window.” 

Lena rolled her eyes, shaking off her disgust. “Listen, I’ve got this trip all figured out. It’s an 18-hour trip to National City, which breaks down to six shifts of three hours each. Alternatively, we could break it down by mileage.” She pointed at the visor on Kara’s side; the blonde was only barely paying attention. “There’s a map here, I’ve marked the locations where we can change shifts. Can you do three hours?” 

“Sure can,” Kara nodded. “Grape?” 

Lena shook her head. “I don’t like to eat between meals.” 

“Okey-dokey.” 

There was a long, nearly interminable silence as they wound through the city streets and onto the highway, only interrupted by Kara’s occasional spitting that Lena tried her very best to ignore. At least the blonde had wiped at the mess on her window before rolling it down, even if she did do it with her shirt sleeve. 

They had been silent for so long Kara startled her when she started speaking again. 

“I hope this isn’t one of those trips with long, awkward silences.” 

Lena nodded absent-mindedly. “Me, too.” 

There was a long, awkward silence. Kara shifted in her seat. 

“So, tell me the story of your life.” 

Lena had to laugh. “The story of my life?” 

Kara shrugged. “Yeah, why not? We’ve got eighteen whole hours to kill before we get to National City. Might as well fill the silence.” 

“My life won’t even fill one of those hours. I mean, nothing’s really happened to me yet. That’s why I’m going to National City.” 

“So something can happen to you?” 

“Yes.” 

Kara munched on a grape, pensively. “Like what?” 

“Like going to school to get my PhD, then become a materials engineer and work in a lab doing cutting-edge research.” 

“So you can tinker with _materials_ while locked away in a lab so your research benefits other people?” 

Lena frowned. “That’s _one way_ to look at it.” 

“OK. Suppose nothing happens to you. Suppose you live your whole life in the hustle-and-bustle of National City, but you’re in a lab the whole time so you don’t really see it, so nothing happens and you never meet anyone and never go anywhere and you never become anything, then finally you die one of those big-city deaths where no one even notices you’re dead until two weeks later and your neighbors just can’t take the smell anymore?” 

“Jesus,” Lena hissed, quickly looking over at the other girl. It was a weirdly morbid thought for someone who seemed to be of such a sunny disposition in their limited interaction. _Who the fuck am I stuck in this car with? “_ Lucy failed to mention this dark side of yours.” 

Kara laughed; Lena could see half-chewed grapes still in her mouth. “Yeah, that’s what drew her to me.” 

Lena was unconvinced. “Your dark side?” 

“Yup,” Kara said, smacking her lips with the word. “Why? Don’t you have a dark side? Are you one of those insanely cheerful people? Do you always see the glass as half-full; wait, wait, don’t tell me: do you dot your i's with little hearts?” 

Lena barked out a laugh. “Absolutely not. I have as much of a dark side as the next person.” 

Kara grinned, looking strangely pleased with herself. “Really? How’s this for dark—when I get a new book, I always read the last page first. That way, if I die before I finish it, I know how it ends. That, sweetheart, is a dark side.” 

The brunette rolled her eyes, getting irritated. “That doesn’t make you deep.” She shook her head. “I’m generally a pretty happy person, I would say.” 

“So am I.” 

“Great.” 

“Great.” Kara said through her grin, back to munching on her grapes. “Do you ever think about death?” 

Lena focused on the road. “What kind of question is that? Yeah, I suppose.” 

Kara spat another cluster of seeds out the window. “Uh-huh. I bet. Pretty girl like you, thinking about death. Probably a fleeting thought, that drifts in and out of your mind. I spend hours, no, I spend _days...”_

_“_ What, do you think that makes you a better person somehow?” Lena interrupted, annoyed. 

“Look, when shit goes down, I’m going to be prepared. You’re not. That’s all I’m saying.” 

Lena snorted. “And until shit does go down, you’re just going to ruin your life waiting for it to happen. Congratulations.” 

There was a pause that stretched into another long silence. Lena couldn’t decide if this one was awkward or not. 

“What are you going to do in National City?” she asked before the silence could turn awkward. 

Kara shrugged, too busy chewing her grapes and spitting her seeds to answer right away. She heaved a sigh. “I don’t know. I just got my Communications degree, but I have no idea what I’m going to do with it. I see it as a jumping-off point.” 

Lena chuckled. “You could be a journalist. The kind that writes obits. Something tells me you’d get a kick out of it.” 

She had said it with half jest, half bite, but Kara laughed uproariously, smacking a hand on her thigh and nearly squashing the remaining grapes as she did so. 

* * *

They switched places at the designated point along the beautiful stretch of highway, with Lena calling time while Kara dozed off for a few minutes. Conversation didn’t exactly flow, so Lena had allowed Kara to play one of her cassettes—some music that she didn’t recognize, but that Kara hummed along to contently. It was more than enough to fill the silence. 

Eventually—Lena can’t even remember who started the subject, or how—they began to talk about movies; Casablanca specifically. 

“He doesn’t want her to stay, come on,” Kara argued as she steered. “That’s why he puts her on the plane.” 

Lena shook her head vehemently. “You’re missing the point. I don’t think _she_ wants to stay.” 

“Are you kidding me? Of course she wants to stay. Wouldn’t you rather be with Humphrey Bogart than... whoever the other guy is?” 

Kara’s stomach growled, and Lena had to hold back a grin of satisfaction. Just in time—she had already pre-planned a stop at a rest-stop, and it was already coming up ahead. 

“I wouldn’t want to spend the rest of my life in Casablanca married to some guy who runs a bar. You probably think that’s snobbish of me, but I merely think it’s practical.” 

Kara looked practically bewildered as she turned into the exit for the motel and restaurant. “So you’d rather have a passionless marriage...” 

“And be First Lady of Czechoslovakia,” Lena interjected. 

“...than live with the man you just had the _greatest_ sex of your life with, just because all he does is run a bar in Casablanca?” 

She parked a little aggressively in front of the diner, and Lena gave her a look. “Of course, and so would any other woman in her right mind. You’ve got to be practical; I’m sure Ingrid Bergman is, which is why she gets on the plane at the end of the movie. Case closed.” 

They left the car; Kara was still shaking her head. “I understand,” she said sarcastically. 

“What?” 

“Eh, nothing.” 

Lena followed her indignantly as Kara made her way across the diner, settling in a booth. The brunette seated herself and leaned over the table, practically glaring as a waitress made her way over. 

“ _What?”_

Kara leaned back against the booth, hands behind her head, with a smugness twinkling in her blue eyes. 

“Well, obviously you haven’t had great sex yet,” she said loudly, right as the waitress reached their table. The uniformed woman let out a little squeak of surprise, and Lena was quick to send her on her way with an order for two waters and the menus. 

She waited until the woman was out of sight. “Yes, I have,” she murmured. 

“No, you haven’t.” 

“It just so happens that I’ve had plenty of great sex!” She hissed right as the waitress returned with two menus. Lena felt her cheeks pinken as the woman nearly threw the menus onto the table before scurrying off. 

“Alright,” Kara relented, picking one up and perusing it disinterestedly. “With whom?” 

“What?” 

“With whom have you had this great sex?” she pressed, using air-quotes. 

Lena hid behind her menu. “I’m not going to tell you that!” 

Kara shrugged. “OK, fine. Don’t tell me.” 

There was another long, awkward pause. Lena was suddenly not hungry anymore; her eyes drifted to the dessert section, but every so often peered over the plastic border of the menu to stare at Kara with utter indignance. She slapped the menu back on the table. 

“Agnes Gordon.” 

Kara laughed. “Agnes? Aggie? Nah. I’m sorry, but you so did _not_ have great sex with _Agnes_.” 

“Did too!” 

“Nuh-uh,” Kara waved a finger close to her face. “An ‘Agnes’ can do your taxes. If you want to find a house in a good school district or a lively knitting group, Agnes is your gal. Between the sheets? Not Agnes’ strong suit. Can you imagine?” Her voice climbed to an infuriating falsetto. “‘Oh, I love you Agnes; do it to me, Aggie, I can’t get enough of you, _Agnes.’_ It just doesn’t work.” 

Lena wanted to interject, but this time she clocked the waitress returning with their waters. The woman gingerly placed their cups on the table, levelling them with an awkward look. 

“What can I get you?” 

“I’ll have the Number Five.” Kara said, sliding the menu over. 

“What kind of bread do you want that on?” 

Kara flashed a smile. “Surprise me!” 

The waitress responded in kind before turning to Lena. “How about you, dear?” 

“I’d like the pie à la mode.” 

“Apple... à la mode...” 

“But I’d like the pie heated, and I don’t want the ice cream on top, I’d like it on the side. I’d prefer strawberry instead of vanilla if you have it. If not, then no ice-cream, just whipped cream, but only if it’s real. If it’s out of a can, then nothing.” 

The waitress blinked, gripping her pencil and notepad in a white-knuckled grip. “Not even the pie?” 

“No, _just_ the pie. But then, not heated.” 

The waitress gaped a little before crossing out something in her notepad and taking their menus, leaving their table with a bit of a forced smile. 

Lena turned back to Kara, only to find the blonde looking at her with utter disbelief. 

“What?” 

Kara shook her head forcefully. “Nothing, never mind. So, how come you broke up with _Agnes?”_

_“_ How do you know we broke up?” 

“Pfft. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t be with me, you’d be with Agnes the Wonder Woman.” 

Lena scowled. “First of all, I’m not _with_ you. Second of all, it’s none of your business why we broke up.” 

“You’re right, you’re right. I don’t even want to know.” 

There was a beat, and Lena inwardly cursed Kara for managing to get under her skin so easily. 

“If you must know, it was because she was insanely jealous, and I had these Day of the Week underpants, so...” 

Kara suddenly slammed her palm on the table, loud enough for several patrons to turn to their table in alarm as she made a loud buzzer sound. 

“Eeeeeh! Hold on, hold on, judge’s ruling on this. Explain. Days of the Week underpants?” 

Lena nodded, glaring at the few people still staring. “Yeah. They had the days of the week on them. Lucy gave them to me, she thought they were funny. One day, Agnes says to me, ‘you _never_ wear Sunday.’ She got all suspicious. Where was Sunday? Where had I left Sunday?” 

“And?” Kara prompted, looking enthralled. 

“And I told her, but she didn’t believe me.” 

“What??” 

“They don’t make Sunday.” 

“What? Why not?” 

Lena could only shrug. “Because of God, I guess.” 

“And _that’s_ why you broke up?” 

“Yes.” 

Kara’s laughter was loud and rambunctious. Her shoulders shook with it, and it was infectious; Lena soon found herself joining in, because it _was_ ridiculous. 

She was wiping a tear of laughter out of her eye when Kara bombarded her again. 

“So, how many people have you slept with?” 

She sobered up immediately. “What?” 

“Just women? Or men, too?” 

“Both,” Lena responded before she could think better of it. 

“OK, how many?” 

“I’m not going to tell you that.” 

“Okay, fine. Don’t tell me.” 

Lena rapped her fingers on the table, knowing she was being bated but unable to resist it. “Two.” 

Kara snorted. “Two? Two of each, or two total, one of each?” 

The brunette furrowed her brows. “One of each.” 

“Ha!” Kara barked. “So you’ve been with a total of two people, and you’re telling me based on two people that you _know_ whether or not you’ve had great sex? Sorry, but your sample size is lacking.” 

Lena rolled her eyes. “Well, how many have you slept with? Men, women, both?” 

“Women,” Kara drawled. “Exclusively women. And I don’t know.” 

“What do you mean, you don’t know?” 

The blonde shrugged. “I just don’t know.” 

“Well, is it between zero and three? Four and ten? Or ten and a hundred?” Lena asked, leaning over to scrutinize the blonde’s face a little closer. 

Kara crossed her arms. “Ten to a hundred.” 

“Is it closer to ten or closer to a hundred?” 

“Eh, closer to ten.” 

Lena’s follow-up was interrupted by the waitress, bringing in a solitary piece of pie and Kara’s enormous sandwich. 

They tucked in, and the conversation was forgotten. Lena bit into her pie and scowled. 

“Ah, man, they heated it!” 

Kara snorted. 

Lena picked dejectedly at her pie while she waited for it to cool, while Kara scarfed down her sandwich and the accompanying fries with a speed that was frankly appalling as far as the brunette was concerned. 

When the check came, Kara simply tossed a twenty on the table. Lena gave her a look, and began counting the bills in her wallet to give the exact change of her meal plus a not-so-generous tip, since her pie came heated, after all. 

She felt Kara staring at her. 

“What?” Kara kept staring, and she wiped at her face. “What? Do I have something on my face?” 

“You’re a very attractive woman.” 

Lena gaped, stunned. “Oh. Thank you.” 

Kara leaned over. “Lucy never told me you were so attractive.” 

“Maybe Lucy doesn’t think I’m attractive,” Lena reasoned with a cocked eyebrow. 

Kara shook her head, smiling. “Nope, not a matter of opinion. Empirically speaking, you are attractive.” 

Lena shifted uncomfortably in her seat, leaning away from the blonde. “Kara. Lucy is my _friend.”_

She got up, tossing her money onto the table and walking away. Kara scrambled to catch up. “So? 

Lena walked determinedly to the car. “So, you’re going with her.” 

“So?” 

Lena stopped abruptly at their parking space. “Do I really have to explain this to you? Don’t come on to me while you’re going with my friend!” 

“I wasn’t coming onto you.” 

Lena scoffed, unlocking the car and dropping into the driver’s seat with a huff. Kara quickly followed to the passenger seat, leaning over obnoxiously into Lena’s space. “What? Can’t I say a woman is attractive without it being a come-on? Not every lesbian is out to sleep with you, y’know.” 

Lena stared, and Kara raised her hands. “Alright, alright. Let’s just say—for the sake of argument—that it _was_ a come-on. What do you want me to do, take it back? Alright, I take it back. I take it back!” 

“You can’t just take it back!” 

“Why not?” 

“Because! It’s already out there.” 

There was an awkward pause. Kara clutched a hand to her chest dramatically. “Oh, golly, you’re right. What are we supposed to do now? Should we call the cops? _It’s already out there.”_

_“_ Just... let it lie, okay?” 

“Okie-dokie, let it lie. That’s my policy, let it lie. Let it lie.” 

There was another pause, and Kara smirked. “So, do you want to spend the night in the motel?” 

Lena wanted to bang her head on the steering wheel, and Kara continued. “See what I did? I didn’t let it lie.” 

“Kara...” 

“I said I would, and then I didn’t--” 

“Kara...” 

“I went the complete opposite way--” 

“ _Kara.”_

_“_ Yes?” 

Lena let out a deep breath. “We are just going to be friends, alright?” 

Kara nodded, leaning back into her seat and propping her feet on the dashboard. “Yeah, great, okay. Friends. Best thing.” 

Lena started pulling out and away from the rest-top, ready to breathe a sigh of relief. It was not meant to be. 

“You realize, of course,” Kara began again, stretching as far as her seatbelt would allow, “that we can never be friends.” 

Lena was inclined to agree, but opted for politeness. “What do you mean?” 

“What I’m saying is, and _this_ is not a come-on, is that now that the sex thing is out there, it’s always going to hover. It’s going to get in the way. No one can be friends with the sex thing in the way.” 

“That’s not true,” Lena argued. “I’m friends with people I’ve had sex with.” 

“Yeah,” Kara snorted. “All two of them. But seriously, you’re not.” 

“I am.” 

“No. You only think you are.” 

“Are you saying I’m not friends with them because I’ve had sex with them?” 

“That’s exactly what I’m saying. Even if you hadn’t had sex with them—once the possibility, or the mere thought of sex is out there, friendship becomes an impossibility. Because someone in the equation wants to have sex with the other person.” 

“They do not.” 

“Do too.” 

“Do not.” 

“Do too.” 

“How do you know?” 

“Because if someone in the equation finds the other person attractive, sex thoughts get in the way. Someone wants to have sex, and are therefore any potential friendship is ruined.” 

Lena scoffed. “What if they don’t want to have sex with you?” 

Kara shook her head, looking mightily amused. “Doesn’t matter. The sex thing is already out there, so the friendship is ultimately doomed. End of story.” 

Lena’s lips pursed into a line. “Well. I guess we’re not going to be friends, then.” 

“I guess not. My hypothetical come-on ruined it all, I’m sorry,” Kara quipped, not sounding sorry in the slightest. 

“That’s too bad,” Lena said. There was a short pause. “You’d be the only person I’d know in National City.” 

The car pulled into National City with the first rays of sunshine illuminating the George Washington bridge. It was an unbelievably beautiful day as Kara drove up to the curb overlooking the square. She popped the trunk and left to gather her things; Lena left her seat to take over the wheel. 

Kara hefted her two duffel bags onto one shoulder with very little effort and slammed the trunk shut. She turned to Lena. 

“Well, it was nice knowing you.” 

Lena chuckled. “Yeah. It was... interesting.” 

“Yeah. Thanks for the ride!” 

“You’re welcome.” 

Kara nodded, and Lena nodded back. It was as awkward as the start of their journey, and Lena offered her hand. Kara took it—her palms were sweaty again, and they shook hands. 

“Well,” Lena quipped. “Have a nice life.” 

Kara’s smile went from ear to ear, her brow raised jovially like she was in on a secret. “You too.” 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I say next week? Oh well, this story is practically done, so EH. Why not.

_ Five Years Later _

National City Airport was crowded. The holidays approached, and Kara had to weave through the crowds of people on her way to her terminal. She held her messenger bag close to her side so she wouldn’t bump into the people walking in the opposite direction. That’s when she saw them.

A couple, interlocked in a loving embrace—the PDA was a little bit much. They were all hands, all over one another. She recognized them; the man mostly, but the brunette he was locking lips with was also strangely familiar. She stepped closer, bumping into a few people who grumbled as they stepped out of her way. 

The man was good-looking, in a conventional way. Tall, dark, and handsome, as Kara’s mother would probably say. His hair was  disheveled , though it looked intentionally done, and his beard was full, but well-groomed. He wore a sharp navy suit, no tie, and  well-fitting pants. 

The woman, on the other hand, was beyond beautiful. Her jet-black hair was done up in a tight ponytail, and she wore a maroon pantsuit that was absolutely not designed for comfortable travel, but looked impeccable—all sharp angles and fitted fabric.

Kara stepped closer until she was practically peering over the brunette’s shoulder to get a closer look. Sometimes she forgot about boundaries, especially when she was observing so intently, trying to put a name to a face. 

The couple froze with a startled yelp as they finally noticed her approach. Without another face in front of his, Kara could finally recognize the man. 

“Jack!” She greeted with a smile. “I thought it was you! Kara Danvers.”

Jack looked utterly  embarrassed ; his companion looked like a deer caught in headlights, green eyes owlishly wide as she tucked herself closer to him. 

Jack laughed timidly, holding out his hand. “Kara, of course, Kara, hi. How are you?”

“I’m good, I’m good. I thought it was you. Are you still with your father’s company?”

“Branched off, started my own a couple of years ago. How about you, are you still...”

Kara shook her head. “I work for  CatCo now. Politics.”

“The  hard-hitting stuff, eh?”

“You could say that”

There was a pause as Jack nodded, and Kara just looked from Jack to the woman beside him, who still looked at her rather oddly. Kara could not place her. 

“Oh,” Jack said, as if just  remembering his manners. “Kara, this is Lena, Lena Luthor. Lena, this is Kara Danvers. She interviewed me and my father a few times while she worked for the  _ National City Enquirer.” _

Lena nodded; she didn’t extend her hand, but smiled cordially, if tightly. 

“Hi.”

“Hi,” Kara greeted back. “Well, great to see you, Jack. See you around.”

* * *

Lena waited until the blonde was well out of sight before releasing sigh of relief so heavy Jack raised his brows in concern. She patted his chest, shaking her head in complete disbelief she had just run into Kara Danvers. 

“Thank God she couldn’t place me! I drove from college to National City with her five years ago and it was the longest night of my life. Not to mention the strangest.”

“What happened?”

Lena shook her head, remembering that odd evening with distaste. “She made a pass at me! And I said no; she was going with this good friend of mine, uh...” her eyes widened as the name completely escaped her. “God, Jack, don’t get involved with me. I’m 26 and I can’t even remember the name of the girl I was such good friends with I wouldn’t get involved with her girlfriend!”

Jack laughed. “So, what happened?”

“When?”

“When she made a pass at you? And you said no?”

“Oh. I said we could just be friends, and then... this part I remember, she said we could never be friends because now the sex thing was ‘out there’.” She frowned. “It was a weird drive.”

Jack laughed again, leaning in to kiss her once more. “Kara Danvers has always been a bit of an oddball.”

Lena snorted. “You can say that again.”

He moved to capture her lips again, only to be nearly slapped away when Lena suddenly slammed her hands to his chest. “Lucy Lane!” She yelped with a smile. “ _ That  _ was her name! Thank God.”

He kissed her through her smile. “Safe travels, Lena. I’ll miss you.” He paused. “I love you.”

She smiled, green eyes sparkling. “You do?”

“Yes,” he nodded emphatically.

Lena couldn’t stop smiling if she tried. “I love you, too.”

* * *

Kara moved toward the back of the plane trying her very best not to bump into anyone on her way. It was a tall order—she had to lower her head not to hit the ceiling of the small aircraft, and her messenger bag was full to bursting. She made it to her seat just in time to clock in a familiar face sitting on the row in front of hers. 

Jack’s kissing partner—Lena, she remembered. She sat primly at her seat, perusing a copy of the  _ Enquirer  _ with a little smile tugging at her lips; her eyes weren’t quite moving as if they were actually paying attention to the paper. Suddenly, as Kara approached, their eyes met for the briefest of moments, green on blue, and suddenly Lena yanked the paper up to hide her face. 

Huh. Interesting. 

Kara found her seat—directly behind Lena’s middle seat—and sat, fastening her seatbelt loosely as she peered over the seats to get a better look. She could see Lena’s cheeks pinkening. The man next to her gave Kara an odd look. 

It wasn’t until the plane was well up into the air, when the flight attendant came by with the drinks cart, that Kara could finally place Lena Luthor. 

The attendant approached the row before hers with a smile, and Kara could hear Lena’s voice, cordial, but firm. 

“Do you have Bloody Mary mix?”

“Yes,” the attendant said, starting to pour. Kara could just make Lena’s hand shooting off to stop her. 

“No, wait, here’s what I want: Regular tomato juice, not too much ice, and fill it up about three quarters, and  _ then  _ add a splash of the Bloody Mary mix. Just a splash.”

Kara smiled, raising her head and nearly poking it into the next row.

“And a little piece of lime, but on the side, please.”

“Lena! Federal University, right?”

Lena looked spooked. “Yes.”

Kara popped back down, then waited for the attendant to move away before coming back up. “Did you look this good at Federal University?”

“No,” Lena scoffed with a little laugh. 

Kara waggled her brows. “Did we ever...?”

Lena nearly spat her drink as the man next to her turned an incredulous look towards them. “No, no! Jesus.” She turned her gaze to the man. “We drove from university to National City the day after graduation. It was an 18-hour drive.”

The man smiled. “Would you two like to sit together?”

“Oh, that won’t be...”

“Great! Thanks, man!”

They switched, and Kara made herself comfortable in her new seat. She looked at Lena intently. “You. You were a good friend of... Linda’s, right?”

Lena smirked. “ _ Lucy’s.  _ I can’t believe you can’t remember her name!”

“What do you mean?  Of course, I remember. Lucy, right? Lucy Lance.”

“ _ Lane.” _

"Lane, right, that’s what I said. Yeah, whatever happened to her?”

Lena felt her cheeks redden, but pressed on. “I have no idea.”

Kara looked dramatically scandalized. “You have no idea? But you were such good friends, weren’t you? If I remember correctly, we didn’t make it because you were such good friends, right?”

“You were going out with her,” Lena pointed out, rolling her eyes. She hadn’t exactly forgotten how... annoying Kara was, but she could have done without the reminder while she was  locked in a flying metal tube. 

Kara smiled widely. “Was it worth it? This sacrifice for a friend you  haven’t even kept in touch with?”

Lena let out a little scoff. “Kara...”

“Yes?”

Lena patted her arm condescendingly. “You may find this hard to believe, but I never really considered  _ not  _ sleeping with you to be a sacrifice.”

Kara’s smile was unmarred. “Fair enough, fair enough.”

There was a pause—Lena remembered enough of her long drive with Kara to know it wouldn’t last. She was correct. 

“You were going to be an... architec--”

“An engineer.”

“Right, that’s what I said. So, did you?”

“At first. Now I’m... I work corporate.” Lena said vaguely. 

“Ah, great, great. And you’re with Jack, that’s great. How long have you been together? Three weeks?”

Lena’s eyes widened. “A month. How did you know?”

Kara laughed, shrugging her shoulders. “Well, you take someone to the airport, that’s clearly the beginning of a relationship. That’s why I have never, ever taken anyone to the airport at the beginning of a relationship.’

“Why?” Lena asked, puzzled. 

“Because eventually, things move on, right? And you don’t take that someone to the airport. And I never wanted anyone to be able to say, ‘Kara, how come you never take me to airport anymore?’”

Lena blinked. “It’s amazing.”

“What?”

She gestured vaguely towards Kara. “You. You look like a completely normal person, but you’re actually like... the angel of death.”

She ignored Kara’s giggles. “Are you going to marry Jack?”

Lena nearly choked on her drink for the second time in the span of minutes. “We’ve only known each other a month. Besides, neither one of us is looking to get married right now.”

Kara leaned into the back of her seat, closing her eyes with a little smile. “I’m getting married.”

Lena whirled to face her, unable to hide her surprise. “You are??”

“Yup,” Kara quipped matter-of-factly.

“ _ You  _ are getting married.”

“Yup.”

“Who is she?” Lena asked, genuinely curious as to _who in their right mind_ would willingly choose to spend the rest of their life with Kara Danvers.

“Kate Kane. She’s a CFO, she’s keeping her name.”

Kara cracked an eye open, in time to see Lena smiling as she shook her head. “You’re getting married,” she laughed. 

Kara raised a brow. “What’s so funny about that?”

“It’s just so... optimistic of you.”

“Well, you’d be amazed what falling madly in love can do for you.”

Lena patted the blonde’s shoulder. “That’s wonderful, Kara. It’s nice to see you embracing life in this way.”

Kara chuckled. “Besides, you just get to a certain point where you get tired of the whole thing.”

Lena’s hand on her shoulder stilled. “What whole thing?”

“The whole single life. You know, you meet someone, you have the safe lunch where you decide whether you like each other well enough to graduate to dinner. You go to dinner, maybe dancing or a movie. After the obligatory three dates, you go back to her place and you have sex, and the minute you’re  done , you know what’s going through your head?”

Lena shook her head, her expression betraying she was already halfway to disbelief. Kara pressed on. 

“You’re lying there thinking ‘how long do I have to stay and hold her until I can get up and go home? Is 30 seconds enough? An hour?”

Lena opened her mouth, closed it, then opened it again. “ _ That’s  _ what you’re thinking?? Is that true?”

“Of course. How long do  _ you  _ like to be held at night?” Kara regarded her pensively for a short moment. “All night, am I right? That’s the problem. Somewhere between 30 seconds and all night is your problem.”

“I don’t have a problem,” Lena retorted emphatically. 

“Yes, you do.”

They were thankfully distracted by an announcement from the pilot, updating the time to their destination. Lena quickly took the opportunity to raise her paper up again, shielding herself from conversation. 

She was successful for the rest of the flight, and was even able to rush out of the plane before Kara, since the blonde had to go back a row to procure her luggage. 

Kara caught up with her at the moving walkway leading out of their terminal. 

“So, you’re staying over?”

Lena sighed. “Yes.”

“Would you like to have dinner?”

The brunette levelled Kara with a suspicious look. Kara raised her hands in mock surrender. “What? Just as friends.”

“I thought you said we could never be friends.”

“That’s baloney, when did I ever say that?”

“On the drive to National City.”

She waited for the memory to hit Kara; it did in a few seconds and the blonde nodded. “No, no, I remember. You’re right. We can’t be friends, because of the sex thing.”

There was a pause. “...unless we are both involved with other people. Then we can. This is an amendment to the earlier rule—if the two people are in other relationships, then the pressure of possible involvement is... lifted.”

Lena raised an  eyebrow, sensing Kara was nowhere near done. Once again, she was proven correct. 

“Although... no, that wouldn’t work, either. Because what happens is, the person you’re involved with doesn’t understand why you need to be friends with the person who has already come on to you—it must mean something is missing from your relationship and you have to go outside of it to get it. And then you say no, no, it’s not true, there’s nothing missing, the person you’re involved with  accuses you of being secretly attracted to the person you’re just friends with—which you probably are, let’s face it—which brings us back to the original rule, before the amendment, which is we cannot be friends. So where, oh where does that leave us?” 

“Kara...”

“Yeah, Lena?”

“Goodbye.”

Kara smiled, giving Lena an appraising look. She held out her hand, and Lena took it out of politeness. They shook—Kara's hand was sweaty, like it had been back on their drive five years ago—and then promptly began an awkward walk in the same direction. Kara laughed. 

“I’ll... stop walking for a minute. You go ahead.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *yeet*
> 
> aiight, maybe Kara is a bit foul-mouthed here, but girl's going through a tough time. Let the baby drop some f-bombs lol

_Five Years Later_

Lena walked into the restaurant making a beeline to their usual table. The hostess smiled at her in recognition, offering a polite nod of acknowledgement. Lena returned it, taking a deep breath as she spotted Sam and Andrea in her line of sight. 

She sat just as waiter arrived, taking their order. “Sorry I’m late.” She turned to the waiter. “Here’s what I’d like: I wand a Campari and soda, but here’s how I want it. I want the Campari in a glass with ice, and the soda on the side, but only in a bottle. I don’t want the soda in a glass, I want to mix it myself.” 

The waiter rushed to scribble her order, then promptly scurried away to fulfill it. Lena was barely listening to what her friends were talking about. 

“So, I looked through his pockets, right?” Sam said. 

Andrea rolled her eyes, and Lena could relate. “Sam, why do you go look through his pockets?” 

“And you know what I found?” 

“What?” 

“They just bought a dining room table. He and his ‘estranged’ wife just went out and bought a $1500 dining table.” 

“Where?” 

Sam waved her off. “The point isn’t where, Andrea! The point is, he’s never going to _actually_ leave her.” 

Lena and Andrea shared a look. “So what else is new?” Andrea retorted. “We’ve been telling you this for _two years.”_

Sam shook her head glumly. “You’re right, you’re right. I know you’re right.” 

Andrea sighed, leaning over the table to take Sam’s hand. “Why can’t you find someone _actually_ single? When I was single, I knew lots of nice, single men. And women! There must be someone.” She motioned towards Lena with a smile. “Lena found someone!” 

Sam scoffed. “Lena got the last good one, didn’t she?” 

Lena fiddled with the straw on her glass of water. “Jack and I broke up,” she announced matter-of-factly. 

“ _What?”_ was the chorus that followed. 

“When did this happen?” Andrea inquired, hands moving away from Sam’s to grasp Lena’s. 

“Monday.” 

Andrea looked scandalized. “And you waited three days to tell us??” 

Sam had a pensive look. “You mean Jack’s available?” 

Andrea shot her a withering glare. “For God’s sake, Sam! Don’t you have any tact? Lena’s _obviously_ very upset--” 

“I’m not that upset,” Lena interjected. “Honestly, we’ve been growing apart for some time—you know how it is.” 

Sam looked horrified. “But... but... you were a _couple!_ You were together. You had someone to go places with—you had a date for all national holidays.” 

Lena shrugged. “I just said to myself, you deserve better than this. You’re 32 years old...” 

“And you’re not getting any younger,” her friends chorused. 

“I don’t care about that,” Lena waved them off. 

Andrea sighed. “God, you’re in such great shape.” 

Lena continued. “Well. I’ve had a couple of days to think about it, to get used to it, and frankly? I feel okay. More than okay. I am completely over him.” 

“Good,” Sam quipped, fishing a Rolodex out of her purse and opening it with flamboyance, quickly flipping through the wealth of cards stored. 

Andrea smacked her arm. “Really, Sam!” 

Sam merely shrugged. “How else do you think you do it?” She retorted, flipping through and finally pulling out a card. “I’ve got the perfect guy.” 

“Then _you_ go out with him,” Lena quipped. 

“I’ve got someone.” 

“You’ve got someone who’s already got _another_ someone.” Andrea pointed out with a glare. Sam ignored her, waving the card in Lena’s face. 

“I don’t happen to find him particularly attractive, but you might. You don’t have a problem with chins like me.” 

“Sam, I’m not ready yet,” Lena said with a sigh. 

Sam leaned back. “I thought you just said you were over Jack.” 

“I am,” Lena said firmly. “But I am in a... mourning period, let’s say.” There was a pause, and Lena stretched to see the card. “Who is it?” 

Sam smiled widely. “James Olsen.” 

Lena groaned; Andrea rolled her eyes. “You fixed me up with him six years ago! That was disastrous!” 

“Oh, okay, okay.” She put the card back, flipping through and picking another one out. “Maggie Sawyer?” 

“She’s been married for over a year,” Andrea supplied flatly. 

“Really. Married, huh?” Sam tutted and dog-eared the card, relegating it to the back of the Rolodex, which was filling up with other dog-eared cards. She flipped through once more. “Wait, wait, I got one, I got one...” 

Lena raised a hand to stop her. “Sam, there’s no point in going out with someone I might really like if I met them at the right time, but who right now has _no chance_ of being anything more than a transitional person.” 

“So, you need a rebound fuck.” Andrea quipped, and Lena glared. 

“Okay, okay,” Sam said, clicking the Rolodex shut. “But don’t wait too long, you hear me? Do you remember Mike? His wife left him, and everyone said ‘give him time, give him time, don’t move in too fast,’ and six months later he was dead.” 

Lena looked at her friend, bewildered. “What are you saying? I should just marry someone right away in case they’re about to die??” 

“At least you can say you were married,” Andrea laughed. 

Sam rolled her eyes. “I’m saying the right person for you might be out there _right now,_ and if you don’t grab them, someone else will, and you’ll have to spend the rest of your damn life knowing that someone else is married to your person.” 

Lena wanted to bang her head on the table. Andrea smacked Sam’s arm again. 

* * *

The stadium was packed and noisy, with a massive wave making its way across the stands. The National City Charmers were winning, but not by much, and the excitement in the air was palpable. Kara made a show of rising and falling with her sister as the waves rolled by them, but slumped despondently back to her seat when it was done. 

“Jeez. When did this happen?” Alex asked, eyes still on the game. 

“Friday.” Kara sighed. “Kate comes home and she just says ‘I don’t know if I want to be married to you anymore.’ You know, like it’s not me, like the problem is with the institution of marriage or something, like it’s just something she’s been thinking about in a casual way. I’m calm. I say ‘why don’t we think about it, take some time, not rush into anything,’ she says OK.” 

She paused to let Alex yell at the umpire for a moment. “Next day she says she thought about it, wants a trial separation. She just wants to _try_ it, she says. We can still date, she tells me, like that’s supposed to make anything better. Jeez, I got married so I could _stop_ dating, so I really don’t see how ‘we can still date’ is a big incentive—I do not see the appeal, because as far as I’m concerned, the last thing you want to do is go back to dating your wife, who’s supposed to love you.” 

Alex yelled again. “And I tell her that, which is when it crosses my mind that maybe... maybe she doesn’t love me anymore, and I ask her exactly that, and you know what she says? She says ‘I don’t know if I ever loved you.’” 

“Oof,” Alex groaned sympathetically, just as another wave rolled through their section. They rose and fell with it, Kara slumping on her seat again. “Ooh, I’m sorry, Kara. That’s harsh.” 

Kara shrugged. “You don’t bounce back from that sort of thing—that's just particularly harsh.” 

“Thanks, Alex.” They paused, with Alex keeping her eyes on the game, turning to Kara every now and again. 

Kara heaved a forlorn sigh before continuing. “Then she says, she just found out that someone in her office is going to South America, and Kate’s going to sublet her colleague’s apartment. I couldn’t believe it—and I told her that. Just as I say it, the doorbell rings, and my words are still kinda hanging in the air in a little balloon connected to my mouth.” 

“Like a cartoon,” Alex supplied. 

“Yeah, like a cartoon. And then I get to the door—you're not going to believe it—and there are movers there. I get suspicious, right? I mean, the timing is just too fucking perfect—so I ask her, when did she book the movers. She doesn’t answer. So, I come up to them and ask ‘hey, when did this lady book you for this?’, and they’re standing right there, three big-ass dudes, one full of tattoos and wearing a T-shirt that says ‘Don’t fuck with Superman’. And at that point I’m getting angry, so I ask again ‘Kate, when did you make this arrangement?’ and you know what she says?” 

“What?” 

“She said she booked them a week ago. A week! I tell her, ‘Kate, you’ve known this for a whole damn week and you didn’t tell me?’ and you know what she says—you know what is the real kicker here?” 

“What did she say?” 

“She said she didn’t want to ruin my birthday.” 

Alex grimaced as another wave came through, sparing Kara a sympathetic glance as they rose and fell once more. 

“Shit, you’re saying Mr. Superman knew you were getting a divorce a whole-ass week before you did?” 

Kara nodded dejectedly. “Mr. Superman knew.” 

“Jesus.” 

“I haven’t even told you the worst part.” 

Alex whirled toward her, an incredulous glint in her eyes. “There’s worse?? What could be worse than Mr. Superman knowing about your divorce before you?” 

Kara sighed. “It’s all a lie. The apartment subletting, the colleague, the trial separation--all of it. She’s in love with someone else, some attorney. She moved in with her.” 

Alex’s eyes widened. “How on earth did you find out?” 

“I followed her and stood outside the building.” 

Kara felt her sister’s hand on her shoulder, squeezing lightly. “Kara, that’s fucking humiliating.” 

“Ha. Tell me. Standing there in the middle of the street, the ultimate schmuck.” She paused, looking to the pitch, not really seeing it. “I knew this would happen. The whole time I knew, even though we were happy, it was all an illusion and one day she’d kick the shit out of me.” 

“Kara,” Alex said, finally turning in her seat to face her sister. “Marriages don’t break up on account of infidelity, I don’t think. It’s just... a symptom. A symptom that something else is wrong.” 

Kara glared as yet another wave came rolling by. She stood, still glaring. “Oh, yeah? Well, Alex, that symptom is _fucking my wife!”_

Alex shrugged, cringing a little. “At least you got the apartment.” Kara gave her a blank stare. “What??” 

* * *

“So... I just happened to see his American Express bill.” 

Lena stuck her head out of the Personal Relationships section to glare at her friend. “Sam,” she began, already exasperated. “What do you mean, you _just happened_ to see it?” 

Sam shrugged, picking a random book from Self-Help. “Well, he was shaving, and there it was, just lying there. In his briefcase.” 

Lena pinched the bridge of her nose. “What if he came out and saw you digging through his damn briefcase?” 

“You’re missing the point,” Sam waved her off. “I’m telling you what I found.” 

“Well, what did you find?” 

Sam looked dejected. “He spent $200 on a nightgown for his wife.” A beat passed. “I don’t think he’s ever going to _actually_ leave her!” 

Lena’s sympathy had long run dry on this subject. “No one thinks he’s ever going to leave her, honey.” 

Sam sighed, jamming the book back into the shelf angrily. “You’re right, you’re right. I _know_ you’re right.” She suddenly turned, her attention catching on something happening behind Lena. “Someone’s staring at you.” 

Lena froze. “What?” 

“Someone’s staring at you in Personal Growth.” 

Lena discreetly glanced over her shoulder; her gaze met the blue, inquisitive eyes of Kara Danvers. Her hair was shorter now, tumbling just above her shoulders in waves. She wore glasses, and a tan pantsuit that looked rather smart. 

She snorted at Sam. “I know her. You’d like her—she's married,” she snipped. 

Sam whacked her with a magazine. “Who is she?” 

“Kara Danvers. Last I heard she was a writer for CatCo Magazine.” 

Sam looked over, failing atrociously at being discreet. “She’s _very_ cute.” 

Lena scowled. “You think she’s cute?” 

“How do you know she’s married?” 

“Because the last time I saw her, she was getting married.” 

“And how long ago was that?” 

Lena stopped to think. 

“Five, six years ago? Why?” 

Sam pretended to be fascinated by a rotating holiday card display. “So...” she drawled, spinning it slowly. “She might not be married anymore.” 

“She’s also _extremely_ obnoxious,” Lena retorted, nipping that line of thought in the bud. She was not successful, because Sam merely shrugged, smirking widely. 

“I don’t know, this seems awfully like one of those movie meet-cutes. When one thinks the other isn’t all that great...” 

“I _did_ say _extremely_ obnoxious, didn’t you hear me?” 

“But then they fall madly in love.” 

“Cut the crap, Sam. She also _never_ remembers me.” 

“Lena Luthor!” 

Lena had to whirl to face Kara—she had not noticed her approach, and now the blonde was just a few inches away. “Hi, Kara.” 

“I thought it was you.” Kara smiled. 

Lena smiled back politely. “Indeed, it is. This is...” she motioned towards Sam, only to find the rotating display creaking away as it spun, and just a flash of Sam’s red shirt as she dashed outside. Lena frowned. “That _was_ Sam, my friend.” 

Kara’s smile didn’t waver, but she stood awkwardly, shifting her weight on her feet. Lena had forgotten how tall she was, and it seemed like Kara was also refamiliarizing herself with her face. 

The blonde popped her lips. “So. How ya doing?” 

Lena crossed her arms. “Fine.” 

“Oh, fine. How’s Jack?” 

“I hear he’s fine.” 

Kara’s brow rose. “You hear he’s fine? Are you not with Jack anymore?” 

Lena shook her head. “No, we just broke up. A couple of weeks ago.” 

“Oh, golly, that’s too bad,” Kara said, awkwardly rubbing the back of her head. 

“Yeah, well, you know. Life.” There was a pause. “What about you? How have you been?” 

“Oh, fine, fine. Y’know. Fine.” 

“How’s... how’s married life?” 

Kara gave a little laugh, but Lena noticed her smile did not quite reach her eyes anymore. “Well, _that_ isn’t going so well. I’m, uh. I’m getting a divorce.” 

“Oh.” There was another pause, and Lena found herself lightly patting Kara’s arm. “I’m really sorry. When did it happen?” 

“A couple of weeks ago.” 

“That’s right when Jack and I broke up.” Lena mused, and Kara chuckled. 

“Isn’t that amazing?” 

“Not really. Everybody in National City breaks up this time of year.” 

“Maybe it’s the pressure of the holidays,” Kara said with a nod. 

“Yeah...” Lena eyed her carefully. “Do you mind me asking what happened?” 

Kara’s shoulders seemed to sag. “She left me. She fell in love with an attorney—a _tax_ attorney at that.” 

Lena smiled. “An ‘Agnes’,” she quipped. 

“An Agnes?” Recognition dawned in Kara’s sad blue eyes. “Oh, yeah, right! An Agnes. Well, Sophie, actually, but it’s the same.” 

“I really am sorry, Kara.” 

Kara shrugged, eyes to the ceiling. “Oh, well. What can you do?” She paused. “How about you and Jack? What happened with you guys?” 

* * *

Somehow, Lena found herself sitting opposite Kara in the café adjacent to the bookstore. They both ordered cappuccinos, and Kara was nibbling at a massive, jam-filled pastry. Lena was thoroughly surprised at how easily conversation flowed between them—it was nothing like the drive to National City, and _nothing_ like that hellish plane ride they had shared a few years ago. 

Her spoon clinked against the saucer of her cup as she fiddled with it; Kara was listening intently as she talked—it felt nice to have someone’s undivided attention. 

“When Jack and I started dating, we wanted exactly the same things. We wanted to live together, but we weren’t going to get married, because every time someone we knew got married, it basically ruined their relationship. They never had sex again. And it’s true, it’s one of those secrets no one tells you. I would sit around with my friends who have kids, y’know, and all they would do is complain about how they never did it anymore. Actually, they weren’t even complaining—they just said it so matter-of-factly. They were up all night, exhausted all the time, the kids just took every sexual impulse they had out of them, and Jack and I used to talk about it. We said we were so lucky to have this wonderful relationship, where we can have sex on the kitchen floor and not worry about a kid walking in; we can fly off to Rome on a moment’s notice.” 

She paused, knowing she was rambling, but Kara still listening with rapt attention, munching quietly on her pastry. 

“Anyway, I promised to take my friend’s kid—Ruby, she’s great—I promised to take her to the circus. We were in the car playing ‘I Spy’--you know, ‘I spy a lamppost, I spy a mailbox’--and she looked out the window and there was this couple with two little kids, and one of them was on her mom’s shoulders, and Ruby just said ‘I spy a family’, and I started to cry. I just... I just cried. And when I got home, I said ‘Jack, the thing is, we never do fly off to Rome on a moment’s notice’.” 

Kara nodded in understanding; mouth still full. “And the kitchen floor?” She asked. 

Lena shook her head. “Not even once.” She let out a little laugh. “It’s this cold, hard Mexican ceramic tile.” 

Kara laughed, patting her hand sympathetically. “You poor thing.” 

“Anyway,” Lena took a breath. “We talked about it for a long time, and I said ‘this is what I want’, and he said ‘well, I don’t’, and... it was over. And he left, and the truth is, I really... I feel really fine. I am over him. Completely. That was it for him, that as the most he could give, and every time I think about it, I’m more and more convinced I did the right thing.” 

Kara regarded her curiously for a moment, before breaking into a smile. Lena focused on a few errant crumbs that still clung to her lips and found the whole picture oddly endearing. 

“You sound really healthy,” Kara said. 

Lena sighed, unconvinced. “Yeah.” 

They stayed until dusk, talking, not noticing the time as it passed. They walked out of the café once a server sheepishly flipped the sign of the door to ‘Closed’-- Lena left a large tip on their way out. 

Neither moved away yet, both content to just keep walking aimlessly through the streets of National City. Lena fiddled with her bag; Kara had her hands deep in her pockets. Lena regarded the high-rises that made the skyline so distinct. 

“Well,” she said after a beat. “At least I got the apartment, with the ceramic tile and all.” 

Kara laughed. “Everyone says that to me, too. But I don’t get it—what's so hard about getting an apartment?” 

Lena raised a brow. “In National City? It’s a nightmare!” 

“No, it isn’t, not if you know where to look.” Kara said with a shake of her head. The sun caught on her blonde locks as they waved with the movement. “Just read the obituaries. Find out who died, then go see the doorman. Honestly, they should just put the two sections together: Real Estate/Obituaries. Imagine it: _Mr. Klein died today, leaving a wife, two children, and a spacious two-bedroom apartment with air-conditioning. Utilities included. Walking distance to National City Metro.”_

Lena laughed, hard, and Kara’s smile widened. 

“When we first met,” Kara continued after a breath. “I really didn’t like you that much--” 

“I didn’t like _you.”_ Lena interrupted. 

“You did, too. You were just so... uptight. You’re much softer now.” 

Lena narrowed her eyes. “I hate that. It sounds like a compliment, but really it’s an insult!” 

Kara raised her hands in surrender. “Alright, alright. You’re still hard as nails.” 

“I just didn’t want to sleep with you,” Lena said, hands coming to rest at her waist. “And you were the one who decided to write that off as a character flaw instead of dealing with the possibility that it might have something, _anything_ to do with you.” 

Kara paused, pondering. Her eyes lit up. “What a jerk. Okay. What’s the stature of limitations on apologies?” 

Lena smiled, narrowing her eyes. “Ten years.” 

“Oof, I’m really cutting it fine. How about this: I’m sorry.” 

“Apology accepted,” Lena quipped. “Hey. Would you like to have dinner with me sometime?” 

Kara’s eyes bugged out, as if she did not know how to take the proposal. She looked pensively at Lena, but her blue eyes were full of mirth. “Lena Luthor,” she muttered. “Are we... are we becoming friends now?” 

Lena flushed. “Well. Take it or leave it, Danvers.” 

Kara’s smile finally reached her eyes. “Oh, I’ll take it.” 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There it is... Arguably the most iconic scene in WHMS, now with Kara and Lena mwhuahuahua

They were friends. 

There was no denying it, and as strange as it might feel, Lena did not see the need. Surprisingly, a friendship with Kara Danvers—something the blonde herself had declared utterly impossible—came to them quite easily. It felt natural. 

Meeting Kara for lunch, even on hectic days when she had to knock smarmy businessmen down a peg or several, became a near necessity. Lena came to enjoy the woman’s cheery disposition, even when it came with a healthy dose of morbid observations. It was refreshing. 

Movie nights also became a thing, usually at Lena’s apartment, because Kara did not want to linger at hers, with the ghost of her failed marriage hanging in the air and echoing off the empty walls. They would get take out—an abhorrent mixture of pizza  _ and  _ potstickers that Lena secretly loved—and talk for all hours of the night. 

“Heya,” Kara said one night at her door, brandishing the newest bag of food from the new Chinese place down Lena’s street. “Quick, turn on channel eleven.”

Lena let Kara divest herself of the bag in her kitchen, rushing to the television and  fiddling with the remote. “What’s so important on channel eleven?”

“Casablanca,” Kara said, bringing over an absurd quantity of  potstickers in a plastic container and flopping over onto Lena’s couch. 

“Casablanca,” Lena repeated, slumping down a little more gracefully next to her. She gave her a look. “Are we too lazy for utensils, now?”

“ Indeed, we are,” Kara quipped, reaching into her pocket and pulling out an impressive wad of napkins. “But don’t worry, we won’t taint your pristine white couch with grease.”

Lena hummed, taking one. They watched in silence until Kara waved a  potsticker in the screen’s direction. 

“Now, would you  _ really  _ say that you would be happier with the Lazlo guy than with Humphrey Bogart?”

Lena furrowed her brows. “When did I ever say that??”

“When we drove to National City. Don’t you remember?”

“I never said that,” Lena said emphatically. “I would never have said that.”

“Did too,” Kara nudged her. “If I remember correctly, you’d rather be the First Lady of Czechoslovakia than be stuck with the man who runs a bar—even though you had the  _ greatest  _ sex of your life with him, because you’re a  _ practical  _ woman. Like Ingrid Bergman.”

“I never...” Oh. “Oh my god, you’re right. I did say that.”

Kara looked smug. “ Of course, you did.”

Lena allowed Kara to stew in her victory for a few moments, all the while thinking why on Earth her younger-self would have said such a preposterous thing. Victor Lazlo over Humphrey Bogart. As if. 

She turned to look at Kara from the corner of her eye; the blonde was totally engrossed in the movie, chewing silently. Lena held back a smile. It seemed that every time she was with Kara, the other woman was eating something. Grapes. A sandwich. A truly enormous pastry. Lena looked at her friend intently, only half-following the movie. There were dark circles under Kara’s eyes, and despite her seemingly constant eating, it looked like she had lost some weight. 

“How have you been sleeping?” Lena asked, squeezing her arm. 

Kara’s shoulders sagged into the back of the couch as she sighed. “Not great,” she said honestly. “Maybe I’m coming down with something. Last night I was up at like four in the morning watching  _ The Golden Girls.  _ In Spanish.” Her voice became nasally. “ _ Buenos  _ _ dias _ _ , Blanche.  _ _ Donde _ __ _ esta _ _ Rose?” _

Lena laughed a little, but Kara sighed deeply. “I’m not well.” She turned to Lena. “How about you?”

Lena shrugged. “I went to bed at 7:30 last night, can you believe it? I haven’t done that since elementary school.”

Kara laughed a little. “That’s the good thing about depression. You get your rest.”

“I’m not depressed,” Lena retorted, because really, she was just  _ fine.  _ She worked. She went shopping. She picked up her groceries and cooked wholesome meals for herself in her kitchen with the Mexican ceramic tiles. She had even picked up a spinning class for a bit. She was taking care of herself. “You’re the one who’s depressed, watching  _ Golden Girls  _ in Spanish at four in the morning.”

“Yeah, yeah, OK.” Kara looked at her watch. “Oh, hey, look at the time! Put on channel 24, it’s the nude talk show.”

Lena yanked the remote away, scowling. “How can you watch that?”

“What? You don’t think it’s interesting to watch naked people discussing politics, or insider trading, or the drug war?”

Lena held the remote far, far away. “No way. Compromise. ESPN?”

Kara sighed. “Nah, I’d rather keep watching the movie, then.”

The silence of their movie watching did not, as it was custom with Kara, last long. 

“Hm, Ingrid Bergman. Now that’s a lady who’s low maintenance.”

“Low maintenance?”

“Yeah. There are two kinds of women: high maintenance and low maintenance. I’m a low maintenance kind of gal.”

“And... so is Ingrid Bergman, apparently?”

Kara nodded, reaching for another  potsticker . “Yup. Definitely an L.M.”

Lena furrowed her brows. “Which one am I?”

“Oh, you’re the  _ worst  _ kind,” Kara said through her chewing with a laugh. “You’re the kind of woman who  _ thinks  _ she’s low maintenance, but is really high maintenance.”

“I don’t see it that way.”

“Oh, really?” Kara laughed, and her voice climbed to that infuriating falsetto Lena was familiar with. “ _ I’ll start with the house salad, but I don’t want the house dressing on it; I’ll have the balsamic vinaigrette instead, but on the side, and then the salmon with  _ _ mustard _ _ sauce, not honey, but I want the sauce on the side... _ ‘On the side’ is a very big thing with you.”

Lena pondered it for a moment. “Well,” she said, unrepentant. “I just want it the way I want it.”

“Right,” Kara clicked her tongue. “High maintenance.”

Lena wanted to interject, but Kara’s attention was back on the TV. “Oh, best last line of a movie! Hands down.”

She smiled, listening to Humphrey Bogart. 

“ _ Louie, this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.” _

* * *

This time, Lena was helping Kara pick up a new rug. The blonde had finally had enough of her empty apartment, and decided that what she needed to fill the void left by her wife was a huge, gigantic, completely excessive rug to cover her entire living room and then some. So that was their mission. 

Before the store, Kara tagged alone as Lena posted a frankly insane number of letters. The brunette had greeted her as she came down her building, holding her hat so it wouldn’t fly in the wind with one hand, the other clutching a huge stack of correspondence. 

They had walked to the nearest post box, and Kara waited patiently as Lena picked letter by letter, examined the address, the edges, the seal, and the stamp before putting each one through the mail slot. One by one. 

Kara slumped against the mailbox. “Do you still sleep on the same side of the bed?”

Lena pondered for a moment. “I did for a while, but now I’m pretty much using the whole bed. I’m like a starfish,” she joked. 

Kara nodded; Lena put in another letter. “That must be nice,” she sighed. “I feel weird when just my leg wanders over. I end up lying like a mummy, completely still. I miss her.”

Lena offered a sympathetic smile as yet another letter made its way in. “I don’t miss him. I really, really don’t.”

“Not even a little?”

Lena paused, letter midway through the opening, and Kara had to fight the urge to not slam it in. “No,” Lena said. “You know what I miss? I miss the  _ idea  _ of him.”

“Hm,” Kara mused, eye twitching at the letter that still hadn’t been pushed in. “Maybe I only miss the idea of Kate.”

Lena smiled a little, returning to her incredibly slow task with an amount of focus that made Kara impatient. With a huff, the blonde grabbed the stack from the other woman’s hand and jammed them all into the slot at once. 

Lena  stared; Kara sighed. “No. I miss the whole Kate.”

* * *

“You know,” Lena began once they were at the furniture store, looking at rugs. “I found this book that gives some really great tips on how to enjoy being alone.”

“Oh?” Kara said, absent-mindedly running a hand through one of the rugs. She wanted her new rug to be  _ plush.  _ Maybe so she could like face-down on it and mope more comfortably. “Like what?”

“Like... never eat standing up. Make a nice meal for yourself and sit at a table.”

Kara nodded. “Sounds good. Maybe I’ll do that. Once I get a table.”

* * *

They were rolling the rug onto Kara’s living room floor with some degree of difficulty. Kara had picked the biggest, fluffiest, most unwieldy thing the store had in stock. 

“I’m definitely coming down with something,” Kara huffed, sweat trickling from her temples after the effort of hauling the rug several flights of stairs because it simply didn’t fit in her building’s elevator. “It’s probably a 24-hour tumor. Those are going around, I hear.”

Lena rolled her eyes, both at Kara and at the unhappy realization they had unrolled the rug the wrong way, so it leaned a fair amount onto the walls, folding into itself. “I think it goes the other way,” she gestured for them to rotate it, grabbing onto a corner. “And you don’t have a tumor.”

Kara tugged at the other corner. “How do you know?”

Lena huffed. “If you’re so worried,  go  see a doctor.”

“See a doctor,” Kara snorted. “For what, for them to tell me it’s nothing?”

They managed to rotate the damn thing, and fell into it happily, tired and hot. Lena stretched all of her limbs out, feeling the softness of the material beneath her. Beside her, Kara heaved a heavy sigh.

“Will you be able to sleep?” Lena asked. 

She could feel Kara’s shrug. “If I don’t, I’ll be okay.”

“What will you do?”

“I’ll stay up, come to this rug and lie face down. And I’ll moan. Wait, let me practice now. Eeeuuughhh...”

Lena laughed. “Good night, Kara.”

“Good night, Lena. Eeeuuuughhh...”

* * *

“ So, I’m having sex, right? Really going at it, and the Olympic judges are watching like hawks. They’re looking for any flaw in technique, but I nailed the compulsories. So, this is it. The finals. I get a 9.8 from the Canadian—awesome. A perfect 10 from the American. And then my mother, dressed as a babushka, gives me a 5.6.” She stared at Lena. “What do you think that means?”

Lena could only blink at her. 

“I have no idea.”

Kara put her hands deep in her pockets, staring at the sculptures surrounding them. The museum had been Lena’s idea. She took a sneaky bite of the pretzel Lena had bought her earlier, before they came in. “OK, what about you? What’s your weird sex dream?”

“ Basically, it’s the same one since I was twelve.”

“You’ve had a sex dream since you were twelve??”

“Well. Not really. Well. I don’t know.”

Kara stepped closer, eyeing a particular sculpture with distaste. “What happens?”

“It’s very embarrassing.”

“Okay, don’t tell me.”

There was barely a pause. “Basically, there’s this guy...”

Kara  interrupted; mouth still full of pretzel. “What does he look like?”

Lena gestured vaguely to her own face. “He’s just kind of... faceless. I don’t  know .”

“Okay. Faceless guy. Then what happens?”

“He rips off all of my clothes!” Lena said, mimicking the motion over her jacket. 

Kara blinked. “Then what??”

“That’s it.”

Kara stopped walking, turning to Lena with an incredulous look. “That’s it?”

“That’s it,” Lena confirmed. 

“That’s it. A faceless guy just... rips off your clothes. And  _ that’s  _ the sex fantasy you’ve been wearing since you were twelve??  _ Exactly  _ the same?”

“Well, no. Sometimes I vary it a little.”

“Which part?”

Lena smirked. “What I’m wearing.”

Kara whacked her on the shoulder. 

They walked then, for a long while. Kara’s focus wavered at times, while Lena explained—in great detail—everything about the sculptures they saw, the paintings, the historical artifacts. Kara scarcely glanced at the little printed informational  placards ; if anything piqued her interest, Lena would undoubtedly tell her all about it. 

They stopped at the Egyptian exhibit—Lena was talking about some late Pharaoh and how he married his sister who had married her brother or some such incredibly incestuous thing. Lena turned to her, green eyes bright and plum-tinted lips tugged into a smile, ponytail swinging with her movement. It made Kara smile back.

“Do you want to go to a movie tonight?”

The brunette froze; the smile turned into a little grimace. “I’d love to, Kara, but I can’t.”

“Why not?” Kara asked in jest. “ Whaddya got, a hot date?”

Lena’s smile was back, but it was an awkward little one. “As a matter of fact, I do.”

“Oh.” Kara said. Suddenly her hands felt heavy in her pockets. 

Lena stepped to her, fiddling with the buttons on the blonde’s jacket. “I was going to tell you but... I don’t know. I felt strange about it.”

Kara’s eyes snapped to meet Lena’s. “Why?”

Lena rubbed her neck. “I don’t know, we’ve... we’ve been so...”

Kara held Lena’s wrist. “Hey, it’s fine. We’re friends, Lena. I’m happy for you! I think it’s great that you have a date.”

“You... you do? Are you sure?”

“Of course.” Kara leaned in. “Is that what you’re wearing?”

Lena stepped back, hands nervously wiping at her pants and jacket. “Yeah. Well. I don’t know! Why?”

Kara gave her an appraising look. “I think you should wear skirts more. You look really good in skirts.”

“I wear skirts at work all the time.”

“Nah-ah—those are business skirts. And, while they do great things for your butt, I mean the flowy kind. A weekend kind of look. You look  good in those.”

“I do?” Lena smiled widely, cheeks a little pink. 

“Yeah.”

Lena took the fabric of Kara’s jacket in her hand, rubbing it between her fingers. “You know, Kara, I think... I think you should get out there too.”

Kara shook her head. “No, no. I’m not ready.”

“It’s time.”

“I can’t.”

Lena gave her a sympathetic pat on the shoulder. “You should.”

Kara sighed. “Maybe I will.”

* * *

They were walking along Central Park about a week later; Kara was trying to beat the wind as she took bites out of an enormous cloud of cotton-candy. She complained loudly, lips tinted a little blue from the treat. 

“I’m telling  you; it was the most uncomfortable night of my life.”

Lena nodded. “The first date back is always the toughest.”

Kara mocked her in a petulant tone. “ _ The first date back...  _ You’ve only had the one date. How do you know it won’t get worse?”

Lena kicked a pebble out of the way, looking displeased when it scuffed the leather of her boot. “How much worse can it get than having her reach over, pull a hair out of my head, and start  _ flossing  _ with it??”

Kara whined as a piece of cotton candy was lost to the wind. “You’re talking dream date compared to my horror.”

“Really? How?” Lena asked, yanking a piece of cotton candy between thumb and forefinger, ignoring Kara’s protesting grunt. 

“It started out fine. She was a very nice person, and we were just talking about this restaurant she wanted to go to. We get there, and they had like, fake food set up all up in the window—the plates on the menu,  y’know ?  So, I joke, I say ‘wow, food’s ready, we can just grab it and go, what a quick meal.’” 

Lena laughed, and Kara was bolstered. “See! It’s at least a  _ little  _ funny. I wasn’t expecting a standing ovation, but at least a smile. I got nothing. So I downshift into small talk and I ask her where she went to school, and she says Gotham City College and that just reminds me of Kate, then all of a sudden I’m in the middle of this massive panic attack, and my heart’s beating like crazy, and I’m sweating like a pig.”

“Kate went to Gotham College?”

“No ,” Kara retorted, waving her off with a sigh. “She went to Metropolis University. But they’re both Eastern League schools. I was so upset, I had to leave the restaurant.”

Lena gave her a side-hug. “Kara, I think it takes some time. It might be months before we’re actually able to enjoy going out with someone new.”

“Yeah,” Kara agreed wistfully, veering off path to lean against one of the metal railing overlooking a little pond. 

“And it might take even longer for us to actually be able to go to bed with someone new.”

“Oh, I did go to bed with her,” Kara quipped nonchalantly, taking a big mouthful of cotton candy now that the wind had subsided. 

Lena blinked. “You went to bed with her?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh.”

* * *

The ball hurtled towards her, and Kara’s bat made solid contact as it sent the projectile hurtling back with a loud smack. She prepared herself for the next one. In the batting cage next to her, Alex narrowly missed her ball. 

“I don’t understand it,” Alex said after missing another one. 

“What?”

“This relationship with Lena.”

“What do you mean?” 

Alex finally hit one. “You enjoy being with her?”

Kara hit another. “Very much so.”

“And you find her attractive?”

“Yup.”

Alex turned a bewildered look to her sister, momentarily forgetting about the balls zooming past her head. “And you’re  _ not  _ sleeping with her?”

“Nope.”

Her sister scratched her head under the baseball cap. “I don’t get it. What are you afraid of? Are you afraid of letting yourself be happy?”

Kara hit one ball back with a bit more force than she intended, furrowing her brows. “Come on, Alex. Why can’t you give me some credit? This is a big step for me! Having a relationship with a woman I find attractive, and who I’m not trying to get into bed with. I’ve never done this. I feel like I’m growing as a person. Maturing.”

“Hey!” a little voice called behind them. “Are you finished batting?”

Kara whirled to face the two boys inching their way into her cage. “I got a whole roll of quarters and I got here first, alright?”

“Did not!”

“Did too!”

“Did not!”

“Did too! Scram,  ya little creeps!” She turned back to Alex. “Where was I?”

Alex chuckled, missing another ball. “You were  _ growing.” _

_ “ _ Right. I have to say, it’s liberating, to be this mature. I can say anything to her.”

Alex pretended to be hurt. “Are you saying that you can say things to her that you wouldn’t be saying to me?”

“Nah, it’s just different. A different point of view on things—she tells me about the people she goes out with. I can talk to her about the women I see. It’s great.”

“You talk to her about other women?” Alex looked at her with a strange expression. 

“Yeah. Like, for example: the other night I was having sex with this woman, and it was so, so incredible, I took her to a place that wasn’t human. She actually meowed.”

Alex looked both impressed and disgusted.

“You... made a woman meow?”

“Yeah. That’s the point, Alex—I can tell Lena anything, like these things. And the great part is, I don’t have to lie or puff my chest, because I’m not always thinking about how to get her into bed. I can just... be myself.”

Alex’s expression had not changed. 

“You made a woman  _ meow??” _

* * *

“What do you do with these women? You just... get up out of bed and leave?”

They were sitting in a deli close to CatCo; Kara was just about to take a bite of her triple-tiered pastrami sandwich.

“Sure.”

“Explain it to me, how you do it. What do you say?”

Kara chomped onto her sandwich with gusto. Lena could see a little dribble of mustard on her chin and instinctively reached out to wipe at it. Kara shot her a thankful look. “I say I have an early meeting. Or haircut. Or a squash game.”

“Kara, you don’t even play squash.”

“Sure. But they don’t know that—they just met me.”

Lena scowled. “That’s terrible.”

“I know,” Kara laughed, not really meaning it. “I feel terrible.”

Lena’s fork scraped against her plate as she played with her salad, a bit too forcefully. “I am  _ so glad  _ I never got involved with you! I just would have ended up being some girl you had to get out of bed and leave at three in the morning to go clean your chimney. And you don’t even have a fireplace!” She hissed. “Not that I would know that!” 

Kara snapped to  her; eyes wide. “Why are you getting so upset?? This isn’t about you.”

Lena shook her head. “Yes, it is. You’re an affront to all women. I’m a woman.”

“Listen, I don’t feel great about it, but I don’t hear anyone complaining. Trust me, they all have a fantastic time.”

“How do you know?” the brunette countered with a scathing glance. 

“What do you mean, how do I know? I just know.”

“How? Because they...” Lena motioned from her chest down to her thighs in a suggestive, nearly explosive gesture. Kara blushed. 

“Yes, because they...” She repeated the gesture. 

“And how do you know they’re really...?” Lena made the same gesture, with a little more verve. Kara shook her head. 

“What are you saying, that they fake their...” she lowered her voice, and Lena found her embarrassment endearing. “Are you saying they fake their orgasms?”

Lena laughed, shrugging her shoulders. “It’s possible.”

“Get out of here. They weren’t.”

“Why? Most women, at one time or another, have faked it. You should know this.”

Kara bit down on her sandwich aggressively;  pastrami slid out from the sides and she tried to catch it with her mouth. “Yeah, well,” she chewed on her words and the sandwich, “they haven’t faked it with me, alright?”

Lena leaned over to the blonde, a mischievous glimmer in her green eyes. “How do you know?”

“Because I know! Let it lie, alright?”

The glimmer in Lena’s eyes was positively evil. “Alright.”

Kara waited for a beat, and when it looked like Lena was not going to say anything else, she felt free to take another bite. 

“But you don’t really know, do you?” Lena prodded. 

“ _ Lena.” _

The brunette was smiling widely. “See what I did? I said I was going to let it lie.”

“Lena.”

“But I didn’t,” Lena’s voice  lilted in a sing-song tune. “I went the  _ complete opposite way...” _

_ “ _ You’re insufferable.”

“Thank you. I learned from the best.”

“Can I eat now?”

“Of course, of course.” Lena paused. “But  _ how  _ do you know?”

Kara let her sandwich drop; it flopped rather ungracefully onto her plate, scattering a few of her chips. “I just know, okay?”

“Ah. Right, I forgot.” Lena said, leaning back into her seat with a wicked smile. “You’re a  _ top.  _ You just know.”

Kara was impossibly red. “What’s that supposed to mean??”

Lena rested her chin on her hand coquettishly. “Nothing. It’s just that I know your type— self-assured , take-charge, confident top; you think it would never happen to you, and I guarantee you every single woman out there has faked it at one time in her life. You do the math.”

Kara rolled her eyes. “You think I can’t tell the difference? Have a little faith, Luthor.”

“Nope.”

“Please, don’t be ridiculous.”

Lena blinked, and for a moment, Kara thought she would let the subject drop. But then the brunette’s lips stretched into a slow, languid smile, and her eyes became  hooded, her gaze impossibly intense. Lena let out a laugh; a sultry, rumbling sound that had Kara gulping as the other woman slowly dragged a hand up the delicate column of her neck and bit her bottom lip. 

“Oh... oh, oh...”

Kara felt her blush return full-force; Lena’s moans were deep, a liquid sound soft as velvet that had no place in a crowded deli. 

“Uh... Lena? Are you... are you alright?”

“Oh,  _ God.  _ Oh, God, oh yes, baby, aaah, yes, yes, yes!”

Kara wanted to sink into her seat; diners were looking in their direction with wide eyes as Lena seemed to shatter in place, one hand repeatedly slamming against the table as she writhed in her seat, the other tousling her jet-black hair into a messy, freshly-fucked look. 

“Ah, God, yes, I’m-I’m,  _ oh, fuck! Fuck,  _ yes! Yes, God, yes! Aah! Fuck!”

She finished, smoothing her hair and stealing one of Kara’s fries, taking advantage of the blonde’s stunned state. From the booth behind them, Kara heard someone tell the waitress:

“I' ll have what she’s having.”


	5. Chapter 5

Christmas music filled Lena’s apartment—courtesy of Sam’s daughter, Ruby—as she busied herself with decorating her traditional Christmas cookies. Well, she was attempting to make it a tradition—her batch last year had been a miserable failure, but this  year’s was looking much better already. Nothing that a healthy glob of icing couldn’t hide, in any case. 

Ruby was putting a few paper cranes on her tree. She and Kara had gone out to buy it only the day before, and Lena was grateful for the blonde’s strong muscles when the time came to haul the humungous pine into her living room—it was far too tall for the elevator, and God forbid she bend it or cut it. It was eight flights of stairs, with Kara cursing all the way as pine needles found their way into their clothes, their hair, even their socks. 

“So?” Sam prodded, sneaking a rogue cookie crumb. “Tell me about it”

Lena rolled her eyes. “His name was William Clarke—don't bother remembering it.”

Sam giggled wickedly. “I  _ love  _ hearing about bad dates; it makes me feel so much better. What happened?”

Lena concentrated on piping Andrea’s name on a cookie—bright red icing on white. “He had an  _ air  _ collection.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me right,” Lena said, scowling at a badly looped ‘a’ and mad she couldn’t fix it. “He collects air. He has all these mason jars, right? And they’re labeled. With important dates in history—the march on Washington, the day the Mets won the World Series.”

“OK,” Sam pondered, picking another cookie crumb off the baking sheet. “Was he at least  _ at  _ these events?”

Lena shook her head, grabbing another cookie—one that didn’t look so wonky—and getting started on Kara’s name, being very careful with the strokes of her piping bag. “No,” she hissed. “Whenever something important happens, he just goes outside, opens a jar, scoops up some air, caps it and labels it.  _ Honestly.” _

Sam leaned over the table, eyeing Kara’s cookie curiously. “I really don’t see why you don’t just get with your friend  _ Kara.” _

Lena sighed. “This again, Sam? I told you, Kara’s my friend.”

“But if you could be more? Wouldn’t you want to?”

Lena concentrated on finishing off Kara’s name and looked back, satisfied with the result. “No,” she finally responded. “No, she’s...”

“She’s... what?”

“She’s a mess,” Lena admitted with a laugh. Sam cocked a brow. 

“Then why are you making a cookie for her?”

Lena eyed the finished cookie fondly. “She’s a nice mess.”

* * *

New Year’s was looking to be absolutely miserable, but in the end, Lena had to admit it was made considerably less miserable by Kara’s company. They had gone to a big bash hosted by  CatCo , complete with streamers, silly hats, twinkle lights, and most importantly, an open bar. The band was playing a jaunty tune, and Lena had enough alcohol in her system to dance with Kara—she was even managing to keep up.

“Listen, I want to thank you for taking me out tonight,” she said as Kara dipped her enthusiastically. “I really needed it.”

Kara brought her back up with a laugh. “Forget it. Next year, if neither of us is with somebody, you’ve got a date.”

“You’ve got yourself a deal, Danvers.”

The music slowed then, and Kara twirled Lena close. They froze in place for a second, judging the moment and the music—both felt... too heavy. Kara gingerly let go of their entwined fingers. 

“Want to get some air?”

Lena nodded. “Yes, please.”

They wound through the crowd and out to the beautiful balcony on the top floor of the  CatCo building, with a stunning view of National City’s glittering lights. Revelers were scattered around the balcony, and Kara found them a little space at the railing overlooking the financial district. 

Lena looked over to the city, deep in thought. “Do you think the fact that we’re friends is keeping us from finding someone?”

Kara laughed a little, but when Lena turned to her, her gaze seemed... hopeful. “Yes,” Kara whispered, and Lena couldn’t tell whether she was being sarcastic or not. “I think we should stop being friends. Let’s go home right now and make love all night long.”

Lena felt herself flush; her body instinctively leaned closer to Kara’s. She stopped herself. “You don’t mean that—you know you don’t.”

Kara opened her mouth to respond, but suddenly the excited voices of the crowd descended upon them. 

“Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven! Six!”

Kara gave her a sheepish smile; Lena shrugged. “Three! Two! One!”

Everyone around them kissed. With an awkward shrug, Lena let herself lean over and give Kara a chaste peck on the lips. They both froze upon contact, and Lena could practically hear the cogs turning into Kara’s head; the blonde’s hand twitched upwards, as if she were stopping it from coming to rest upon Lena’s waist. 

They broke apart, looking slightly uncomfortable. “Happy New Year, Lena.”

“Happy New Year, Kara.”

* * *

Lena walked hurriedly, making Sam scurry in her heels to keep up with her. They were late, and Lena detested being late. Her one consolation was that Kara was not exactly the most punctual human being in the world. 

“Where is this place?” Sam huffed behind her. 

“Just up another block. Hurry up.”

Sam groaned audibly. “I can’t believe I’m doing this.”

Lena turned a glare to her friend. “Look--I’m really happy you are. Thank God that whole shitshow with the  _ estranged  _ wife is over. You deserve this. Plus, Kara’s one of my best friends, and you’re one of my best friends. If by some chance you two hit it off tonight, we could all still be friends instead of drifting apart the way you do when you get involved with someone who doesn’t know your friends.”

Sam looked offended. “You and I haven’t drifted apart since I started seeing John.”

Lena rolled her eyes. “If John had ever actually left his wife and I had actually met him, I am  _ positive  _ you and I would drift apart.”

“But he didn’t.” Sam said sadly. 

“ Of course he didn’t. We always told you.”

Sam nodded. “You’re right—you  _ were  _ right, I knew you were right.”

* * *

“I hate that I let you talk me into this,” Alex hissed as they rushed to cross a street. “You know I’ve finally gotten to a point in my life where I’m comfortable with the fact that it’s just me and my work. I’ve made my peace with it.”

She leveled Kara with a glare. “If she’s so great, why aren’t  _ you  _ taking her out?”

“This again?” Kara huffed, annoyed. They were late, and if there was one thing Lena hated more than anything was people who were late. This was already shaping up to be not the best impression. “How many times do I have to tell you,  _ we’re just friends.” _

_ “ _ Are you saying you don’t find her attractive?”

“No, I  _ told  _ you she was attractive.”

“But you also said she had a good personality.”

Kara threw her hands in the air. “She  _ does!  _ God, Alex, why are you being so difficult?”

Alex shook her head vehemently, wagging a finger in Kara’s face as they practically ran up the block. “When  someone's not attractive, the go-to is to say they’ve got a good personality.”

“Look. If you had asked me what she looked like and I said she got a good personality, that’s a way of skirting around her looks,” Kara said, scowling at the unpleasant realization that it was a shitty thing to say. “But just because I happen to mention she has a good  personality it could be either. She could be not that attractive with a good personality, or attractive with a good personality.”

They just made it to the restaurant; Kara’s hand was already on the door when Alex held her arm back. “And which one is she?”

Kara rolled her eyes. “Attractive.”

* * *

The four sat a table that was too small for that number at the trendy place Lena had picked, all clashing elbows and bumping feet. Everyone was silent besides the occasional clinking of their glasses or the apologetic ‘sorry’ over colliding body parts. 

Kara wanted to crawl out of her skin. 

“So, Sam,” she tried with a smile. “Where are you from?”

“Metropolis. You?”

“Midvale.”

“Huh. Never been.”

“It’s... nice.”

“I’m sure it is.”

Kara glanced at Lena with a look that said  _ help me.  _ Lena shrugged delicately, sending a discreet glare towards Alex that said  _ you help me _ . Next to Kara, Alex fiddled with a napkin, looking utterly bored. Kara wanted to whack her upside the head.

They all stared at their menus in awkward silent for an eternity. 

“So...” Kara tried again, swirling her rapidly disappearing drink in the glass. “What are we going to order?”

Alex and Sam just shrugged. Lena piped in. “I think I’m going with the sea bass.”

Kara nudged her sister. “Alex, Lena’s just... a great orderer. It’s not just that she always picks the best thing on the menu, she manages to order it in such a way that not even the chef could know how good it could really be.”

Lena shot Kara a look, Alex shifted uncomfortably in her seat, bumping into Kara’s elbow. “I think restaurants are... overrated.”

“I agree,” Sam suddenly piped in. “I agree. I prefer outdoor activities—I'm already stuck inside all week, why would I want to spend my weekend paying for overpriced food in a stuffy place full of people?”

Alex suddenly leaned over with a smile. “Exactly! And I work in a lab all day—trust me, I know just how dirty these plates are.”

“Labs!” Kara interjected. “Alex, Lena worked in labs... before. Right, Lena?”

Lena looked like she wanted to sink into the floor. “Uh, yes. That was years ago, before I went into business. I’m CFO at my brother’s company now.”

Alex nodded, disinterested. “Ah, cool.”

Sam patted Lena’s arm with a laugh. “Before the corporate ladder, Lena was a lab rat. We worked in the same lab for a while, but while she worked  overtime, I went to  roller derby with my friends .”

Alex laughed. “Roller derby! That was totally me in college! I went a little when I first got to National City!”

“No way!” Sam tittered excitedly. “I was in the  Worldkillers ; which...”

“The Livewires,” Alex interjected.

Lena and Kara exchanged surprised looks. Alex and Sam chattered over their entire meal—neither Kara not Lena were really able to get a word in edgewise. 

“Well,” Kara finally said once they had settled the bill, interrupting whatever it was that Alex and Sam were now bonding over. “That was a great meal, I’m stuffed. How about a walk?”

They all walked in tandem down the avenue, huddled together to fight the cold. A few blocks down, Sam abruptly pulled Lena back to look at some shoes at a store window while Kara and Alex kept on walking ahead. 

“Lena...”

“So,” Lena cleared her throat. “Do you like her?”

Sam grimaced a little. “Kara? Yeah, she’s nice. But... how do you feel about Alex?”

Lena furrowed her brows. “She... she seems okay, I couldn’t really get a sense--”

Sam interrupted her with a wave. “Do you think you’d go out with her?”

“I don’t know. I mean--”

“Because I feel very comfortable with her.”

Lena smacked her lips lightly, leaning on the storefront with a sigh. “You want to go out with Alex.”

Sam bit her lip. “Would it be okay with you?”

Lena nodded. “Uh, sure, sure. I’m just worried about Kara. She’s very sensitive, you know, she’s going through a rough period, so maybe don’t... reject her right away? Be... tactful about it?”

Sam shook her head. “Oh no, I wouldn’t. I understand, totally, don’t worry about it. I can be tactful.”

Up ahead, Kara and Alex pretended to look at a bookstore. Kara watched a small spider spin a web down a shelf from the inside; Alex was doing a poor job of pretending she wasn’t stealing glances at Sam from where they stood.

“So...” she began shyly. “If you don’t think you’re going to call Sam, do you mind if I call her?”

Kara blinked. “Well, no, no. Not at all.” A beat passed, and she sucked air through her teeth. “But... maybe tonight you shouldn’t. Lena’s very vulnerable. I mean, by all means, call Sam, just, y’know, maybe wait a week?”

“Of course! Fine, fine, no problem, I wasn’t even thinking about tonight.”

The other girls joined them after a few moments, and the four walked along a couple of blocks in silence. 

“Well,” Alex suddenly broke it. “I don’t feel like walking anymore. I think I’ll get a cab. Taxi!” She waved one down, and suddenly Sam jumped to take her arm. 

“I’ll go with you.”

“Great!” Alex smiled as they both rushed into the cab without as much as a goodbye. 

Lena and Kara stood at the curb, astonished. 

“That went well,” Kara said with a  long-suffering sigh. “Ice-cream?”

Lena laughed. “Coffee.”

“Frozen yogurt. My treat.”

“Fine.”

* * *

Lena put her hands on her waist, brows furrowed in deep displeasure as her eyes scanned the staggering variety of crap stocked at Sharper Image. 

“I  _ knew  _ we were never going to find anything here. We should have just gone to the plant store—plants are great house-warming gifts.”

Kara laughed. “I still say Sam and Alex could really use that helmet with the beer straws. And it had a fan, too!”

Lena eyed the aforementioned item with clear disgust, not amused by its existence in the slightest. Kara’s attention was diverted by something else.

“Oh! Here it is! The  _ perfect  _ thing. Lena, come look, everyone needs one of these!”

Lena turned to look at had Kara so excited. The blonde rushed to a  karaoke machine, turning it on and flipping through the cassettes. She picked one and excitedly shoved it into the slot. A familiar beat filled the store, and Lena held back a laugh as Kara began to sing giddily. 

“ _ Jitterbug! Jitterbug! Jitterbug!”  _

Kara beckoned her with a crooked finger as she sang, and Lena shook her head in the negative, trying her hardest not to dissolve into a puddle of laughter.

“ _ You put the boom  _ _ boom _ _ into my heart—ooh, ooh _

_ You send my soul sky high when your  _ _ lovin _ _ ’ starts _

_ Jitterbug into my brain—yeah, yeah _

_ Goes a bang-bang-bang ‘til my feet do the same!” _

Lena looked over—a few shoppers looked at Kara as she swayed to the tune, still beckoning her over and wagging her brows. It was fun to watch Kara make a fool out of herself—but Lena could never resist her for long. She stepped up into Kara’s space, sharing the machine’s little microphone as she joined in.

“ _ Wake me up before you go-go _

_ Don’t leave me hanging on like a yo-yo _

_ Wake me up before you go-go _

_ I don’t want to miss it when you hit that high!” _

They danced, they twirled around the chord of the microphone, swaying and hopping and acting silly. Kara’s smile was beaming. 

“ _ So wake me up before you go-go _

_ ‘Cause _ _ I’m not  _ _ plannin _ _ ’ on going solo _

_ Wake me up before you go-go _

_ Take me dancing tonight _

_ I want to hit that high—yeah, yeah!” _

Kara suddenly froze, dropping the microphone to the floor with a stricken look. Lena tripped over the chord, confused as the music continued and Kara... didn’t.

“What’s the matter?” She asked, fiddling with the buttons on the machine to make the backing music stop and failing. “It’s my voice, isn’t it?? You hate my voice. I have a terrible voice, I know. Jack hated it. Every time I would sing something, he would say ‘please don’t sing,’ and I...”

Kara held onto Lena’s sleeve, grabbing it with a swift movement that stopped Lena in her tracks.

“It’s Kate.”

Lena whirled in place. “What??”

“It’s Kate. She’s right over there. She’s coming right at me.”

Wham’s backing vocals continued awkwardly with no one singing along to them, and Lena spotted a couple coming straight at them—at short-haired woman with a timid smile, hand-in-hand with another attractive woman in a sharp pantsuit. 

“Hey, Kara,” Kate spoke, not acknowledging Lena right away. “How are you?”

Kara swallowed, visibly and loudly, looking shell-shocked. “Fine, fine.”

Kate motioned to the woman next to her. “This is Sophie Moore. Kara Danvers.”

“Sophie.” Kara muttered in a whine. 

They shook hands—Lena was worried she’d have to lift Kara’s arm for her. It was unbearably awkward. Kara seemed to remember her presence at the last second. 

“Oh, Lena Luthor. This is Lena Luthor. Kate Kane and... Sophie.”

Lena offered a tight smile. “Hi.”

Kate replied in kind. “Nice to meet you.” She gave Kara an apologetic glance. “Well, see you around, Kara.”

“Yeah,” Kara said flatly. “Bye, Kate. Bye, Sophie.”

Another tight smile, and the couple moved on. Lena slammed her fist on the karaoke machine; it spat out the cassette and somewhere an employee reprimanded her. She ignored them, turning to Kara, who looked like she was about to faint. 

“Kara? You okay?”

Kara nodded weakly. “I’m perfect.” Her lips quivered. “She looked weird, she looked very weird, didn’t you think she looked weird?”

Lena grimaced. “I don’t know, I’ve never seen her before.”

Kara nodded a bit more forcefully, biting at her lip. “Trust me, she looked weird. It’s the haircut. Doesn’t frame her face right, didn’t you think? I thought so, didn’t you?”

Lena held onto her arm. “Kara...”

The blonde shook her off, stepping out in a hurry. 

* * *

“It had to happen at some point,” Kara said at the plant store. Lena was just thankful to hear her talking again—the entire walk there she had been utterly silent, with a haunted look in her eyes. “I mean, I’m fine. In a city of about eight million people, you’re bound to walk into your ex-wife sometime.  So, it happened. And now I’m fine.”

Lena stepped away for a moment to pay, only to return and find Kara staring blankly into a rosebush. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

Kara tugged at one of the leaves. “I’m great. It was like a catharsis, you know? I feel like I looked death in the face and shook its hand. And now I feel fine. No, I feel great. Yeah, no. I really feel okay.”

* * *

Sam and Alex’s new, cluttered apartment was filled with furniture and a thick layer of tension. It had been rolling off Kara in waves when she and Lena arrived with their gift plant, but it was also coming off the new couple as they argued over some wagon wheel coffee table Alex insisted they had. 

Kara had been distracted, perusing their books as she lounged on one of their still-wrapped chairs. Lena tried to distract them by commenting on the great shade of beige of their living room wall. 

“I  works for me,” Alex said of the table. “It says home. It works.”

Sam put her hands on her girlfriend’s shoulders, a placating gesture. “Alright,  just... We’ll let Lena and Kara decide.” She turned towards Kara. “Kara, what do you think?”

Kara reacted slowly, but eventually looked over to the table with clear disinterested. She regarded it for a second. “It’s nice.”

Alex pumped her fist triumphantly. “It’s  _ nice!  _ There you go, case closed.”

“Nuh-uh. Kara has no taste. Lena, what do you think?”

Lena looked it over. It really was atrocious. She crinkled her nose in distaste. Sam  smiled; Alex looked crestfallen. 

“See?”

“What’s so awful about it?”

“Honey,” Sam began, exasperated. “It is so goddamn awful I can’t even begin to explain what is so awful about it.”

“I don’t object to any of  _ your  _ things...” Alex muttered dejectedly. 

“Baby, if we had an extra room, you could put it in there with all of your things including those bar stools and I would never, ever have to see it--”

“You don’t like my barstools!” Alex interjected, stricken. She turned to Kara for help. “Kara?” Silence. “Help me out! Someone has to be on my side here!”

Sam held her face tenderly. “I  _ am  _ on your side! I’m just trying to help you develop a good taste.”

Alex’s brows furrowed. “I have good taste!”

“Honey, good taste is like a sense of humor—everyone thinks they have it, when in reality...”

Kara suddenly stood up, knocking the chair back. All three looked at her, startled as she paced nervously around the room. 

“It starts out like this, you know?” She gestured vaguely at the clutter surrounding them. “We started out like this, Kate and I. We had empty walls. We hung things, we looked at swatches of paint—how many goddamn shades of white even are there?? And then you know  _ what  _ happens? Six years later you wind up at a Sharper Image, singing ‘Wake Me Up Before You Go Go’ in front of Sophie!”

Lena stepped closer, holding onto Kara’s sleeve. “Kara,” she warned in a low tone. “I know you’re very upset, but maybe now is not a great time to talk about this.”

Kara waved her off, yanking her sleeve. “What’s wrong with right now? It’s the perfect time to talk about this. I just want them to see,” she motioned towards Sam and Alex, looking increasingly agitated. “I just want them to see the truth of what this becomes. Everything’s fine, everybody’s in love, everybody’s  _ happy— _ and before you know it, you’re screaming at each other over who owns the fucking stereo!”

She marched over to the coffee table, picking up a rogue plate. “One day, you two will be fighting over this goddamn plate. Mark my words.” She was shouting now, the anger making her fists open and close at her sides. “I mean it, I mean it, Alex. Put your name in your books, and do it now while you’re unpacking, because you know what?  Someday soon you won’t remember whose is whose. Believe it or not, someday you will be fighting over who gets custody of this coffee table, this shitty, awful, fucking stupid wagon wheel table!”

Alex looked bewildered. “You said you liked it!”

“I was being  _ nice!”  _ Kara roared as she slammed the door on her way out. 

Lena looked at Alex and Sam with an apologetic grimace as she rushed to follow. “She just ran into Kate.”

Sam looked intently at Alex. “I want you to know, honey—I will  _ never  _ want that coffee table.”

Lena found Kara pacing on the stoop of the apartment. She leveled her with a glare before saying anything. Kara was already waving her off.

“I know, I know, I  _ know,  _ believe me, I know. I shouldn’t have done that.”

Lena pinched the bridge of her nose, heaving a sigh. “Kara, you have to find a way of not expressing every feeling you have the moment you have it.”

Kara scowled. “Really?”

“Yes. There is a time and a place.”

Kara threw her hands up in the air. “Great. That’s just great. I’ll be sure to attend Lena Luthor’s next lecture on social tact.”

Lena crossed her arms defensively. “You don’t have to get angry about it—not with me.”

“I think I’m entitled to a little anger when Ms. I’m-A-Fucking-Robot is telling me how to live my life!”

Lena’s eyes narrowed dangerously. “Kara. You’re about to cross a line.”

Kara kicked a step, hands fisted at her sides. “ So what, Lena? Is that the end of the world? Crossing a line?” She pointed at Lena  aggressively , her finger jabbing the other woman’s chest. “You know what your problem is? You stand too fucking far behind the line. I don’t even think you can see the goddamn line from where you’re standing.”

Lena stepped forward, challenging. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing bothers you! Ever! You never get  _ upset— _ I've never seen you get  upset over anything at all!”

“Kara, don’t be ridiculous.”

“What?” Kara challenged, her tone mocking. “You never get upset about Jack. I never see it build up inside you. How is that possible? How? Don’t you experience any loss—was there never any heartbreak for you??”

Lena grabbed at Kara’s finger, yanking it away from her chest. “I’ve experienced my loss. I had my mourning period, and now I’m over it. I’ve processed my heartbreak, and you should do the same.”

Kara looked incredulous. “What mourning period, Lena?? You spent an hour at a department store. You left with a new fancy coat and some perfume and heartbreak was fucking off out the window!”

Lena’s lips pressed into a thin line. “I don’t have to take this from you, Kara, I really don’t.” She began walking away. Kara followed. 

“If you’re so over Jack, why haven’t you been seeing anyone?”

“I see people.”

Kara rushed in front of her, stopping Lena in her tracks. “See people? Let me ask you something, Lena—have you slept with a single person since you broke up with Jack? A single one?”

Lena gritted her teeth. “What the fuck does that have to do with anything?? Will that prove I’m over him—fucking somebody? Kara, you’re eventually going to have to move back to Midvale because you’ve slept with every damn woman in National City, and I don’t see that turning Kate into a distant memory to you. Besides, I’ll  _ make love  _ to someone when I’m good and ready—not the way you do it, fucking your way through your phone-book like you’re out for revenge!”

There was a charged pause. Kara’s shoulders seemed to relax. “Are you done now?”

Lena nodded, tired. “Yes.”

“Great. Can I ask you something, then?”

“Yes.”

“Do snapping turtles really snap? Is there an audible snap? Is it more of a click? How hard do they bite again? Do they...”

“Kara.”

Lena brought a finger to Kara’s lips, stopping her wavering voice before the rambling got out of control. Kara’s eyes brimmed with tears, and she looked lost. Lena hugged her. 


	6. Chapter 6

“Jesus, I forgot how much you  _ suck  _ at Pictionary!” Sam laughed as Lena helped her out in the kitchen. 

Lena frowned. “It was  _ baby talk!  _ How Alex and Ruby thought it meant Planet of the Apes is beyond me. I want a rematch.”

Sam patted her shoulder, and Lena could not stay mad at her friend. “You’re happy Alex and Ruby are getting along, aren’t you?”

Sam blushed. “I’m not happy—I'm ecstatic. They get on like house on fire.”

They paused for a moment; Lena busied herself with drying a few plates while Sam fussed over a big cake she had just taken out of the fridge. It had been a rather intense game night with friends, something Lena hadn’t done in the quite some time. She was happy to be back.

“So...” Sam began, wiping at inexistent dust on her counter. “You and Kara both have new people, huh?”

Lena nodded. “It just sort of happened at the same time. It’s nice.”

Sam cocked an eyebrow. “Nice? How are things with Veronica?”

“They’re... nice.” Lena shrugged. “We’re both very busy, so it’s nice when we can get some time together. She loved to meet you guys.” She sighed. “She’s... a  _ grown up,  _ you know? Self-assured. Confident. Mature. I like that.”

“And Kara seems to be getting along with Kelly.” Sam motioned with a flick of her chin to the couple sitting at her couch, snuggling. Lena smiled. 

“I’m glad,” she said honestly. “Kara deserves to be happy.”

“She seems to be,” Sam continued. In the living room, Kelly stood, giving Kara a little peck on the cheek while she walked down to the restroom. “Kelly took us all to this new, fancy salad place last week— y’know, the one with fancy greens like kale and God knows what else. We went on a little double date. It was a nice place; apparently Kara and Kelly go there every week.”

Lena paused her wiping, brows furrowed. “Really?” She pondered that for a moment. “But Kara  _ hates  _ kale. She hates ‘bunny food’,” she said with air quotes.

Sam shrugged.

* * *

Kara was looking through her nearly empty beer bottle. It was a funny shade of green—she couldn’t recall ever seeing glass quite this color. Alex nudged her shoulder as she flopped down on the couch, her landing making Kara bounce in place a little bit. 

“So... how are things going with you and Kelly, huh?”

Kara offered her sister a tight smile. “They’re... nice. Y’know, it’s still new. It’s nice.”

Alex smirked. “ _ Nice,  _ eh?”

“Yeah,” Kara said defensively. “Nice.” She changed the subject. “What have you been up to?”

“Eh, nothing much. Work, home. Bonding with the kiddo,” Alex said, trying for sarcasm, but Kara could see her eyes glimmer at the mention of Ruby, which was only right, since Sam’s little girl seemed to worship the very ground Alex walked upon. She was happy for her sister. “Oh, last week Lena and  Veronica took us to the opera.”

Kara's eyes bugged out. “You went to the opera?”

“It was a last-minute thing,” Alex laughed. “We made it a little double-date.”

Kara’s brows furrowed. “The opera? Lena doesn’t go to the opera; she says it’s always too long and repetitive—she nearly fell asleep when her brother gave us those tickets to see Puccini.”

Alex just shrugged. “Well, as far as I know, she and  Veronica go pretty frequently.  Veronica ’s family is a big patron of National City Theater; they have a box with their name on it and everything.”

Kara frowned.

“But Lena  _ hates  _ the opera.”

* * *

Kara sat in bed, trying to ignore the alarm-clock's blinking red light on her nightstand that told her she should try to sleep. She had a new book in hand, and was trying her very hardest not to flip through to the last page. 

She read a paragraph. Then another. Then the same paragraph again. 

With a huff, she flipped through the book loudly before settling on the last page. 

Her reading was interrupted by the shrill ringing of her phone. 

“Saved by the bell,” she muttered, glaring at the book she dropped in bed. “Hello?”

“Are you alone?” Lena asked from the other side of the line, her voice thick. 

“Yeah,” Kara said, brows furrowing with worry. “I was just finishing a book.”

There was a sniffle. “Could you... could you come over?”

“What’s the matter?”

There was a sob, then mumbling Kara couldn’t make out. “...  getting m-married,” Lena whined on the other side. 

“Veronica’s getting married? Didn’t you guys just break up like two weeks ago? Around the same time Kelly and I did?”

“Not  Veronica ,” Lena said. Her voice broke. “ _ Jack.” _

Kara was already running, leaving her phone hanging by its chord as she dashed out her door without even lacing her boots. 

Stupidly, she ran all the way there. She was panting and sweaty by the time she got to Lena’s building, and only then the thought occurred to her—she should have probably just taken a cab. Or at the very least used the elevator, she mused as she skipped the steps on her way to Lena’s apartment. Her breathing was ragged once she pounded a fist to Lena’s door. 

The brunette opened before Kara had even finished knocking. She wore sweatpants and a ratty sweatshirt, and she looked absolutely terrible. Her hair was sticking out every which way, her nose was red and puffy, and her eyes were swollen from crying. As soon as she saw Kara, she started to cry. 

“Come in,” she cried. 

Kara immediately put her arms around her, hugging her fiercely. Lena burrowed into the crook of her neck. “I’m s-sorry to call you so late,” she sobbed. 

“It’s OK,” Kara patted her back in what she hoped was a comforting gesture. 

Lena pulled back, wheezing through a grimace. “I need a tissue.” She padded further into her apartment, and Kara followed close by. “He just called me up, out of nowhere. Wanted to see how I was. ‘Fine, fine, how are you? Fine,’" she sobbed, waving a hand through the air vaguely as she walked into her bedroom. 

Kara followed as Lena rummaged angrily through her vanity, locating some tissues. She waited for the brunette to blow her nose and sit on the bed. Kara sat next to her. 

“His assistant’s on vacation, everything’s backed up, he’s got a big tech conference in Metropolis... blah, blah blah... And I’m just there on the phone thinking how I’m over him, I really am over him, and I can’t believe I was ever even remotely interested, and then he said he had some news...”

Her tears rushed back, and her sob came from deep within her chest. “She works at  Spheerical ; she’s a bioengineer. I forget her name. He  _ just met her!  _ She’s s-supposed to be his t-transitional person, she’s not supposed to be  _ the one.”  _ Lena cried. Kara held one of her hands, giving it a reassuring squeeze as she just listened. 

“All this time, I’ve been saying he didn’t want to get married,” she sobbed. “But the truth was, he didn’t want to get married to  _ me.”  _ Lena pointed at herself dejectedly. “He didn’t love  _ me.” _

Kara scooched closer, tucking a strand of black hair behind Lena’s ear. “If you could have him back right this second, would you take him?”

Lena shook her head, sniffling. “N-no. But why didn’t he want to marry me? Why didn’t he love me?” She wheezed again. “What’s  _ the matter  _ with me?”

Kara took her face in her hands “Nothing.”

Lena whined. “I’m difficult.”

Kara shrugged with a little smile. “You’re challenging.”

“I’m too structured,” Lena crying, shaking her head in Kara’s hands. “I’m completely closed off.”

“Yeah, but in a good way.”

“No, no,” Lena interjected, crying even harder. “I drove him away. And I’m going to be forty!”

“When?”

“Some day!”

Kara laughed, squeezing Lena’s cheeks and pressing a kiss to her forehead. “In eight years, Lena.”

“But it’s there,” Lena argued through a sniffle. “It’s just sitting there like a big dead end. Men don’t think about things like that—it's not the same. Charlie Chaplin had babies when he was 73!”

Kara brought Lena to her chest, hugging her tightly. “Maybe, but Lena—by then he was too old to pick them up. C’mere.”

Lena laughed as she sniffled into her chest, and Kara ran a hand through her messy hair. “It’s going to be alright. You’re going to be okay.”

“I’m fucking up your jacket.” Lena quipped apologetically, still holding back a sob.

“That’s more than OK,” Kara reassured her. “I hate this jacket anyway.”

Lena chuckled, holding tight. Kara pressed a kiss to her temple. “Here, I’ll go and make you some tea.”

Kara made to get up, but Lena’s grip did not falter. “Kara?” she murmured, her voice timid and vulnerable. 

“Yeah, Lena?”

“Could you... could you just hold me a little longer?”

Kara held her. “Of course.”

Lena snuggled into her chest, nuzzling at her neck, and Kara could feel her heartbeat against her chest. Her neck was wet with Lena’s tears; the brunette’s lips grazed her skin in a soft, barely-there touch that made the hairs at the back of her neck stand, and all Kara could do was suck in a breath and hold it. 

Something changed, then, when Lena felt the movement of Kara’s lungs, the weight of the blonde’s arms around her. She pursed her lips at Kara’s neck, kissing the warm skin beneath softly, and suddenly Kara gasped out the breath she had been holding. The arms holding Lena twitched ever so slightly, and Kara’s heart skipped a beat—Lena could  _ hear  _ it and  _ feel  _ it.

Lena looked up, and her eyes met a tempestuous blue overtaken by black. There was a moment when Lena leaned up, only just, and it hung between them, heavy and full with their shared breath. Kara could not even blink; Lena was drowning in her eyes and couldn’t take it anymore, so she cast her gaze downward, only to meet Kara’s lips, parted slightly, pink and inviting.

She leaned in, hungrily, and finally, finally kissed her. Kara froze, caught off guard for only a second before returning it, leaning against Lena. Lena’s hands lost themselves in Kara’s hair, pulling and tugging her closer, closer, and Kara gasped when Lena bit at her bottom lip greedily. 

Lena couldn’t think, and she didn’t want to. She wanted to feel the soft urgency of Kara’s lips; she wanted to feel the burning of her hands against her skin as they trailed goosebumps in their wake, exploring in caresses that started soft, but evolved and shifted into something frantic. She pulled at Kara’s jacket one moment, and the next it was on the floor; Kara did the same to her sweatshirt, and Lena was only too happy to yank it off and toss it only God knew where. 

Kara was a welcome weight pinning her to her mattress, a comfortable presence. Lena felt  _ safe  _ in her arms; she felt safe when Kara kissed her, when she felt the blonde’s hands questing downward in reverent caresses. She felt safe when she crested a precipice and Kara pushed her over and fell with her. 

She felt safe up until it was all over, and they were both lying side by side at opposite ends of her bed, breathing raggedly and staring at the ceiling like they couldn’t believe what had just happened. 

Lena leaned over to look at Kara. “You... you comfortable?”

Kara hummed the affirmative, nodding lightly. Her blonde hair was mussed, stuck to her forehead with sweat. Lena’s was no better. 

“Do you want something to drink? Or something?”

“Oh, no, no. I’m fine.”

Lena started to get up; the room was stifling now. “Well. I’m going to get some water anyway, so it’s no trouble.”

Kara gave her a little tight smile. “Okay. Water, then.”

Lena scurried away, putting on her robe on the way. 

She went about getting their water deliberately slowly, taking her time finding the  glasses , washing them, drying them. The trickle of water from the pitcher to the glasses was deafening, and the Mexican ceramic tiles were cold under her bare feet. 

When she returned, Kara was sitting up in bed, propped against her pillows and perusing a box where Lena catalogued her VHS tapes into neat little index cards. She handed Kara her glass as she scooted into bed, and Kara chuckled awkwardly. 

“ Y’know ,” she said, waving an index card toward the box. “You can know someone a long time, but until you go to bed with them you don’t really know how they have all their tapes alphabetized and on index cards. Very uh, neat, by the way.”

Lena gave her a tight smile. She let Kara flip through the box for what seemed to be an interminable amount of time. It was as if every sound in her bedroom was deafening—the gulps Kara took when drinking her water, Lena’s deliberately measured breathes, the flicking of the cards, the rearranging of a pillow. 

“So,” Lena broke the silence. “Do you want to watch something?”

Kara froze. ‘Uh, no, no. Not unless you want to.”

“I’m okay.”

The pause was heavy.

“Do you want to go to sleep?”

Kara put the box back on the nightstand. “Sure,” she said, already reaching for the lamp on her side. 

Lena did the same, and they lay like statues for long moments. “Are you comfortable?”

She felt Kara nod, even if she couldn’t see it. “Sure.”

“Sorry, it’s a hard mattress.”

“Oh, no problem. I like hard mattresses.”

Another pause. Elongated, miserable. Lena decided to put an end to the misery. 

“Good night, Kara.”

“Good night, Lena.”

Lena closed her eyes. 

* * *

Kara did not sleep a wink. As Lena’s breaths eventually evened out into soft, delicate little snores, she spent the night staring at the ceiling, mind going nowhere and everywhere at once. At one point in the night, Lena naturally gravitated towards her warmth, nuzzling against her chest. 

The only light came from the digital alarm clock on Lena’s nightstand. Kara could see it out of the corner of her eye, its blinking light basking the room in a red glow. She waited for it, counting the seconds in her head. Whenever Lena stirred, her eyes snapped to the clock. 3:13. 4:06. 

Lena rolled off just as the birds started chirping outside. The clock now read 5:28.

At precisely six o’clock, Kara got up. 

* * *

Lena stirred awake with a rustling sound coming from somewhere in the room. Her arm reached out to the other side of the bed, finding it empty, but still warm. Her eyes snapped open, and she quickly turned.

Kara froze, pants half-on when their gazes met. Blue met green in startled shock. 

_ Somewhere between 30 seconds and all night; that’s where your problem is.  _

_ “ _ Where are you going?” Lena rasped out, voice still thick with sleep. 

“I gotta go,” Kara muttered. 

Lena could only stare. 

_...30 seconds and all night; that’s where your problem is. _

Kara seemed to backtrack as she pulled her shirt on. “I have to go home and change from yesterday’s clothes into today’s clothes and then I have to go to work and you—you also have to go to work, we both have work, and after work, after work I would like to take you out to dinner, if you’re free. Are you free?”

Lena nodded. 

“Fine, great. I’ll call you.”

“Fine.”

Kara stood awkwardly in place for a moment. She then leaned over the bed and gave Lena a little kiss, just at the corner of her lips. 

And then, at 6:02, she bolted. 

* * *

“I swear to God, I will  _ kill  _ whoever thinks it’s okay to call people at this hour,” Sam mumbled into her pillow as her hand blindly reached for the phone. Alex groaned beside her, putting a pillow over her head to drown out the sound. “Hello??”

“ _ Sam, I’m sorry to call so early-- _ ” 

“Lena? What’s wrong? Are you alright?”

Alex peeked out from under her pillow, looking confused. Sam pushed the pillow back 

“ _ I did something terrible _ ,” Lena cried on the other side of the line. 

“What did you do?”

Sam nearly jumped off the bed when another phone rang, this time on Alex’s nightstand. She could barely hear what Lena was saying. 

“No one I know would call at this ungodly hour!” Alex hissed as she picked up. “Hello?” Her face blanched, and she covered the receiver, turning to Sam. 

“It’s Kara.”

* * *

“And she was comforting me, and before I knew we were kissing, and then...” Lena cried, sinking into her pillows. She guessed Kara had not even crossed the street by the time she  dialed Sam. 

“ _ And then??” _

Lena wheezed out a shaky breath. “We did it.”

“ _ That’s great, Lena; you should have done it in the first place. Honestly, you two belong together, everyone can see it except you two. It’s like, two wrongs make a right. How was it?” _

“I thought it was good... but then...” Lena blinked back tears thinking of the speed with which Kara had run out of the apartment. Her rambling ‘I got to go’. That goodbye kiss that seemed like nothing but common courtesy. “But then, I guess it wasn’t.”

“ _ Oh, honey _ .”

“It was like she just disappeared,” Lena cried. “She just... ran out—I'm so embarrassed.”

“ _ Oh, Lena, that’s the worst. It’s horrible _ .”

“I think I’m catching a cold.” Lena sniffled, wiping at the tears still running down her cheeks. 

“ _ I _ _ guess you should never go to bed with anyone when you just found out your ex-boyfriend is getting married... that spells disaster, surely _ .”

“I feel so awful...”

“ _ Oh, honey. Do you want me to come over? _ ”

“No,” Lena shook her head as she said it, biting her lip. “It’s so early, and... I feel terrible. I’m taking the day off.”

“ _ You do that. Get some rest, okay? I’ll call you later. _ ”

* * *

_ “You did what??” _

Kara slammed her fist against the payphone, regretting immediately as pain radiated from her knuckles all the way down to her elbow. “I  _ left,  _ Alex, alright!”

“ _ Kara _ ,” she could picture her sister shaking her head and running a hand through her hair in exasperation. “ _ Why the hell would you do that? I thought you  _ _ said _ _ it was good? _ ”

“It was,” Kara whined. “At least... the during part. But after... I don’t know, I just started feeling suffocated.”

_ “Jesus, I’m sorry?” _

“I just wanted to get out of there. I feel terrible.”

_ “You  _ should  _ feel terrible.” _

Kara sighed, shaking her hand and stretching her fingers. She sniffled, and bit down on her lip not to cry. “I think I’m coming down with something.”

There was a heavy sigh on the other end of the line. “ _ Look, it would have been great if it worked, but obviously it didn’t. _ ”

Kara let out a sad laugh. “Tell me about it.”

_ “Yeah. And now you really have a cosmic fucking mess in your hands, Kara.” _

“I knew calling you would make me feel better,” Kara said sarcastically, wiping at her eyes.

_ “Hey, don’t worry. We’ll talk. Do you want to come over  _ _ for _ _ breakfast?” _

“I’m really not up to it. Thanks, though.”

_ “Alright. Listen, call me later if you want to talk, okay? I’m here for you. Even if you are an idiot.”  _

“Thanks, Alex.”

* * *

Alex heard Sam hanging up the phone on her side just as Kara’s line went dead. Sam turned to look at her with an exasperated expression, running a hand through her hair in disbelief. They spoke at the same time.

“Was that Lena?” 

“Was that Kara?”

They both grimaced, then nodded. 

“It’s fucked,” Sam said with a frown. Alex was inclined to agree. 

“Totally fucked.”

They turned to one another, speaking in unison once again.

“They’re  _ idiots _ .”

* * *

When the afternoon faded into evening, Lena paced her apartment, anxiety building at every minute that passed. She wanted to cancel, but found herself physically unable to pick up the phone and dial Kara. 

She was fifteen minutes late.

Kara was waiting, and to her credit she did not look impatient. She wore a  navy-blue suit  with a white shirt; the top button was left  undone . Her hair was a bit disheveled, as if she had been caught in the wind, and when her eyes found Lena’s across the dining room, she fidgeted with her glasses. 

“Lena! Hi,” she said when Lena approached. She stood, and Lena didn’t know what to do. Did she expect a kiss? A hug? How was she supposed to greet her best friend after last night?

Lena settled for—and regretted it immediately—an unbearably awkward handshake. Kara’s hand hesitated before meeting hers, and when they shook, it was clammy and trembling. Lena sat in an inelegant slump. 

Kara opened her mouth to speak, but no sound came out. They were saved when the waiter appeared, leaving them with heaping glasses of water. They both took a swig. 

Lena felt it bubbling out of her chest before she could stop it. 

“It was a mistake.”

She hadn’t meant to say it like that, but the words were out and Kara broke into a grin that was pure relief.

“I’m  _ so relieved  _ you think so too.”

They took another drink, taking way too long before setting their glasses down again. 

“I mean,” Kara continued, tapping her short nails against her glass. “I’m not saying that last night wasn’t a physically pleasurable sexual experience.”

Lena tried to smile; she wasn’t sure she managed it. “It was.”

Kara nodded; it seemed that as tension left her shoulders, it came to rest upon Lena’s chest. It was hard to breathe. Lena pressed on.

“We never should have done it.”

Kara’s nodding was a little too eager. “I couldn’t agree more. I’m glad we’re on the same page.”

“What a relief.” Lena quipped, feeling her throat tighten. 

“Yeah. Oof!”

They ordered. They ate. It was silent and stilted—it was a far sight from the natural, easy conversations they usually had so effortlessly. Lena could tell Kara was getting restless with the silent, but she didn’t have it in her to break it for the blonde’s benefit. She ate her salad without even tasting the dressing she had forgotten to order on the side. 

Kara waved her fork, gesturing to the space between them. “It’s so nice when you can just... sit with someone and not have to talk. Look at us, eating in silence. Shows you how comfortable you really are.”

Lena nodded with a tight smile.

They ate. In silence. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idiots gotta idiot a little more :D

“It’s like... most of the time, when you go to bed with someone, she tells you all her stories, and then you tell her all of your stories. You know, there’s that talking, that post... You know. But with Lena and me, we’d already heard each other’s stories before! So, once we went to bed we didn’t know what we were supposed to do, you know?”

Alex panted as they ran along the Hudson, nodding along. “And then you bolted like a coward.”

Kara waved her off. “I don’t know, maybe you get to a certain point in a relationship where... Maybe it’s just too late to have sex, you know? It’s sort of like incest.”

Alex pulled a face as they stopped along the banks for a stretch. “You don’t mean that.”

Kara opened her mouth, only to immediately close it again. Her lips pulled into a taut line. “I don’t, not really. Well, almost. Lena’s my best friend. I didn’t think she’d be the kind of person I’d have sex with.”

Alex whacked her sister on the head. “Because you’re a goddamn idiot.”

* * *

Lena fiddled with a button on her shirt while Sam took her time in the dressing room. “Is... Is Kara bringing anyone to the wedding?”

“If she has a plus-one, she didn’t say,” came Sam’s voice as Lena heard the rustling of an obscene amount of fabric. 

“Is she... is she seeing anyone?” Lena asked, even if she told herself she did not care. She did not care, she did  _ not... _

_ “ _ She was seeing this anthropologist.”

Lena’s eyes snapped to the dressing room door. “Really?? I mean. Nice. What did she look like?”

The sound of more rustling fabric told her Sam had shrugged. “Pretty. Thin. Very blonde, big boobs. Your basic  nightmare .” There was the click of the door and Sam stepped out with a little twirl. “So? What do you think?”

Lena choked up at the vision of Sam, all lace and satin trim, draped in white. 

“Oh, Sam.”

“Tell me the truth!”

“It’s beautiful. Just beautiful,” Lena said honestly.

“You don’t think it’s silly? I mean, white--”

“It’s beautiful, Sam. It’s so beautiful, you’re so beautiful...” she felt her eyes pooling with tears, and she wiped at them adamantly. “Stunning.”

Sam laughed, stepping over the train of her dress to embrace Lena in a warm hug. “Oh, honey.”

* * *

The wedding was almost disgustingly beautiful, Lena thought with wonder as she took in the decorations. It was an elegant winter theme, with boughs of holly and pine, twinkling lights, and flowers. It was amazing, and Sam looked so happy it made Lena want to cry with delight for her friend. 

Alex stood at the head of the aisle, looking really smart in tailored maroon suit. Kara was next to her, as her ‘best-woman,’ looking happy and nervous in blue. 

The music swelled, and Lena followed as Sam came down the aisle. All eyes were on her, except for a pair of ocean blues that seemed to forget all about the approaching bride. Instead, Lena could feel Kara following her every movement, and she had to concentrate on her every step not to trip on her heels. The walk down the aisle was interminable.

She finally delivered Sam, taking her place next to her. Her eyes met Kara’s for a moment before she had to look away. 

* * *

“Hi.”

Lena almost didn’t hear Kara approach with the band playing, and she debated pretending she actually hadn’t. But the blonde was coming even closer, so she pivoted on her heel to face her with a tight smile. 

“Hello.”

Kara shifted her weight on her feet, hands in her pockets. “Nice ceremony, huh?”

Lena nodded, crossing her arms and splaying her fingers on the crook of her elbow, grasping at the soft sleeve of her dress. “Beautiful.”

Kara rocked in place for a moment. 

“Boy, the holidays are rough, aren’t they? Every year it feels like I’m just trying to get from the day before Thanksgiving to the day after New Year’s.”

Lena bit at her lip. “Lots of suicides.”

Kara nodded. Lena did too. 

“So,” Kara began again, a hand leaving her pocket to fiddle with the end of her tie. “How have you been?”

“Fine.”

There was a pause. Only briefly.

“You seeing anyone?”

Lena gritted her teeth; her throat felt tight. “Kara...”

“What?”

“I don’t want to talk about this.”

Kara’s eyes widened slightly. “Oh, okay.” There was another pause. Kara waved a hand vaguely between them. “Is it because of what happened?”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Lena repeated, eyes narrowing. 

“Why can’t we get past this?” Kara huffed, sounding impatient. “I mean, are we going to carry this thing around forever??”

“Forever?” Lena hissed. “It  _ just  _ happened, Kara!”

“It happened  _ three weeks ago!” _

Lena could only stare at her in disbelief. She wanted to leave. Kara continued talking. 

“You know how a year to a person is like seven years to a dog?”

“Yes?”

Kara threw her hands up, like the connection was obvious to her. Lena closer her eyes in exasperation. “Kara. Is one of us supposed to be a dog in this scenario?”

Kara smiled, clearly aiming for jest. “Yup.”

“And who would the dog be?”

“You are.”

Lena fisted her hand into the fabric of her dress. “I am?  _ I am the dog?”  _ she hissed, louder. 

Kara nodded. “Yeah.”

“ _ I’m the dog?!”  _ Lena scowled, voice raising enough for people around them to turn, noticing the intensity of their conversation. 

She thought her teeth would crack with the strength of her gritting. She was  _ furious,  _ and hoped the withering glare she sent Kara’s way was enough to clue her in to that. Before she could scream at Kara right there on the dance-floor, she rushed behind a large screen that divided the room, knowing Kara was following. 

As soon as they were behind it, she tore into her. 

“I don’t see that, Kara. If anyone’s a dog here, it’s  _ you.  _ To you this is something that just happened and you think you can say ‘great, it happened, now let’s get on with it, we’ll go back to the way things were,’ like what happened didn’t mean anything!”

Lena felt like she was suffocating. People were still looking at them. She rushed to find a door, an exit, anything. Kara followed, looking confused. 

“Lena! I’m not saying it didn’t mean anything. I’m just saying... I’m just saying, why does it have to mean  _ everything??” _

_ “ _ Because it  _ does,  _ and you should know that better than anyone, because the minute it happens you walk right out the door!”

She felt Kara’s hand trying to reach for her wrist; she yanked it away. “I didn’t walk out, I...”

“No,” Lena agreed with a scoff. “ _ Sprinted  _ is more like it.”

She found a door and went through it; suddenly they were in the kitchens. Lena tried her best to ignore all the waiters and cooks bustling about.

“Lena,” Kara panted as she ran to catch up. “We both agreed it was a mistake--”

“The  _ worst  _ mistake I’ve ever made--”

“It’s always the same, it’s always the same!” Kara cried as they marched through another door, into a hallway. “It’s always the same—the minute you make love with  someone the expectations start.”

“First of all,” Lena whirled to face Kara, angry that her eyes were pooling with tears despite her best efforts. “I’m not just  _ someone.  _ I know you don’t play squash or whatever other bullshit you tell those other women. Second of all, I don’t expect anything from you, okay?”

“Bullshit! You expect me to know how to behave with you now--”

“You don’t have to behave any way with me now, okay?”

“Fine! Fine. But let’s get one thing straight, Lena. I did  _ not  _ go over there that night with the intention of making love to you. That’s not why I went there.” She threw her hands up in the air. “But what was I supposed to do?? You looked at me with those big weepy eyes. You were crying. ‘ _ Don’t go home tonight, Kara, hold me a little longer, Kara,’  _ what was I supposed to do?”

Never in her life had Lena had such a strong urge to slap someone. She suppressed it, but whatever control she had over her tears went out the window.

“What are you saying?” she cried, hating the sob that wracked through her chest. “You took pity on me, is that it? I was just some pity fuck to you? Kara.  _ Fuck. You _ .”

Kara froze, stunned in place. Lena rushed away, running through the first door she could find.

Right in the middle of a toasting crowd. 

Kara bumped into her in her rush to follow, and Lena froze as Alex spoke into the microphone at the front as soon as she saw the two of them barging in.

“I want to propose a toast to Kara and Lena!”

The entire crowd of guests turned toward the two of them with expectant eyes. Lena wanted to melt into the floor. 

“To Kara and Lena,” Alex continued, smiling widely with Sam at her side. “If Sam or I had found either of them even remotely attractive, we would not be standing here today!”

There was a roar of laughter, and at that moment, Sam tossed her bouquet, aiming straight at Lena. 

She almost didn’t catch it.

* * *

Lena made it all the way up to her floor with the Christmas tree. It was a small, bittersweet victory; the top had broken in her struggle, and her hands were blistered and raw. Her arms ached, and she suspected there was not an inch of her that wasn’t covered in pine needles. 

She had just lugged the thing across her foyer when her answering machine beeped. She slumped onto the floor, pine needles and all, when she  heard Kara’s voice.

“ _ Hey, it’s me. It’s the holiday season, and even if this doesn’t happen to be my holiday, I thought I might remind you that this is a season of forgiveness and charity... so, if maybe you felt like calling me back it... it would make me a very, very happy person.” _

She was  vacuuming all the pine needles away—the tree wasn’t even up yet; it lay limply and semi-destructed behind her couch—when Kara called again. The answering machine beeped.

“ _ Y-ello, it’s me again. If you’re there, please pick up the phone. I really, really want to talk to you. Please.” _

There was a long pause. Longer than any Kara could stand, as far as Lena knew. 

“ _ Okay. I’ll take this as a sign you’re not home. Or you are home with that cretin you’ve been seeing.”  _ Another pause. “ _ And if he is there with you, now please understand that, uh, when I say cretin, I mean it in the best possible sense of the word. Honest.” _

The next time Kara called, Lena was just on the couch. Staring at her ceiling. She barely heard her answering machine. 

“ _ Hello? You there? No. No, you’re not there. Are you? Okay. Well. Please call me back.” _

* * *

Kara was pacing her apartment, wearing an anxious path onto her rug, holding the phone in her hands and nearly tangling herself up in the chord. 

“Obviously she doesn’t want to talk to me. What, do I have to be hit over the head?” she muttered to herself. Her voice seemed to echo in her empty apartment. “If she wants to call me, she’ll call me. I’m through making a schmuck out of myself.”

She slammed the phone on the side table, looking at it as if the contraption had personally insulted her. 

“She’ll call me if she wants to talk. She’ll call. She’ll call me.”

There was a pause. 

With a huff, she picked it up again. 

* * *

When Lena walked into her apartment, she heard music. It took her a minute to realize it was coming from her answering machine. Kara began to sing over the backing music.

“ _ If you’re feeling sad and lonely, _

_ there's a service I can render, _

_ tell the one who loves you only _

_ I can be so warm and tender...” _

She walked back out.

The next time, she came in carrying groceries. There was music again.

“ _ Call me, don’t be afraid, you can call me.” _

Lena rolled her eyes. 

“ _ Maybe it’s late, but just  _ _ call _ _ me, call me and I’ll be around.”  _ A pause. “ _ Please, Lena. Give me a call.” _

Lena could only stare at the phone for a long moment. She picked up. 

“Hi, Kara.”

There was noise on the other side of the line, as if Kara was scrambling. 

“Hey! Hi! I... I didn’t think you were going to... I mean, hi. What are you doing.”

Lena released a breath. “I was just on my way out,” she lied. 

“Oh, okay, cool. Where you off to?”

“What do you want, Kara?” Lena hissed. 

The pause was heavy this time. “Nothing,” Kara said quickly. “I just called to say... What are you doing for New Year’s? Are you going to the Rojas’ party?”

Lena shut her eyes tightly. She did not even want to breathe. Kara continued at her lack of response. 

“Do you have a date?  ‘Cause I don’t have a date, and  y’know , we always said that if neither of us has a date on New Year’s...”

“Kara,” Lena interjected through gritted teeth, her hand holding on so tightly to the phone she felt the plastic give. “I can’t do this anymore. I am  _ not  _ your consolation prize. Goodbye, Kara.”

She hung up.


	8. Chapter 8

A black-and-white movie played on the  TV, the sound so low Kara could barely hear it over the crunching of the fortune cookies she was munching on. 

_ What’s so bad about this,  _ she thought. She was huddled on her rug, in front of her couch, with an  obscene amount of leftover  potstickers and fortune cookies around her. The TV flickered like the Christmas lights in the city outside her windows. 

It was great. She had food. She had a TV. She had a plush rug. What else could a girl want?

_ Lena looked over to the city, deep in thought. “Do you think the fact that we’re friends is keeping us from finding someone?” _

_ Kara laughed a little. “Yes,” she whispered. “I think we should stop being friends. Let’s go home right now and make love all night long.” _

_ "You don’t mean that—you know you don’t.” _

Kara shook her head, shaking the daydream away. 

“Air. Some air would be nice right now.”

* * *

Lena smiled through gritted teeth as she was whirled and twirled and dipped between an inch of her life. Her dancing partner didn’t seem to need a moment to breathe; her lungs were burning and her feet hurt in her heels. 

In one particularly enthusiastic dip, she met Sam’s gaze as Alex dipped her wife beside her.

“I hate that I let you talk me into this!”

* * *

Kara took off running, but then felt self-conscious about running in her jeans and boots.  So she started walking, only to burn with anxious energy, because walking was not what she wanted to be doing, and also, walking was so slow, why did people walk anywhere, and why...

A brightly lit display caught her attention, like a moth to a flame. It was an ice-cream store. She rushed in, ordering a three-scoop monstrosity that seemed to come with more sprinkles than ice-cream.

“This was a wise choice,” she muttered at the first taste. “It’s the middle of winter, so I made it winter in my mouth too. Wise.”

She realized quite by accident where she had wondered over. Washington square. It brought her back to eleven years before, to the puttering of Lena’s engine as they pulled up to the very curb where she now stood. 

_ “Well. I guess we’re not going to be friends, then.” _

_ “Have a nice life.” _

Kara shook herself out of it, feeling her hand cold and sticky. She had crushed the ice-cream cone in her hand. “God fucking damn it,” she hissed in the cold air, tossing it in the nearest trashcan and wiping her hand on her jeans without a qualm. She didn't like the realization that hit her chest like a punch.

“God. Fucking. Damn it!”

She began to run. Past the square where Lena had dropped her off, past the bench where they sat eating cotton candy, past the Christmas place where they had bought that insane tree last year. She skidded past the café where they talked about Kate and Jack, the restaurant of that disastrous date where Sam and Alex had connected. 

“Idiot, idiot, idiot!” she gasped as she ran.

* * *

Lena laughed at a joke she had barely heard, lips hurting from the effort of smiling. Discreetly, she turned to Sam behind her. 

“I’m going home.”

“You’ll never get a taxi.”

Lena turned, laughed again—the man talking to her excused himself to get drinks for the countdown. By the look on his face, he expected to kiss her. 

“I’ll walk.”

“Four miles? In heels? Please.” Sam scoffed, Alex laughing on her arm. 

“I can’t stand the thought of not kissing somebody,” Lena lied.

Alex shrugged her shoulders. “Big deal, I’ll kiss you!”

She shook her head. “Thanks, Alex. But I have to go. Goodbye, guys.”

* * *

“Fuck-shit-fuck-shit-fuck— _ taxi! Taxi!”  _

Kara’s lungs were burning. She felt like an idiot, she didn’t even know if Lena would be there. She had to be. She had to. 

Suddenly, the Rojas’ building came into view, a block ahead. The rooftop was illuminated by twinkling lights, and Kara could see the revelers’ funny hats and streamers if she squinted. 

She kept running.

* * *

Lena finally managed to say her goodbyes, despite Sam and Alex’s vehement protests. She ducked out of the ballroom, avoiding her last dancing partner like the plague, and discreetly snuck into the coat check room, finding her coat. 

She waited an eternity for the elevator, standing awkwardly at the doors, huddled in her coat, still cold despite being wrapped up. 

The ding signaling the lift’s arrival could not have come soon enough. She was prepared to rush in as soon as the doors opened. 

And there was Kara.

The blonde looked as surprised to see her as she was. She looked a fright—red-faced, panting, her hair wind-swept... And Lena didn’t even want to think about what the pink stain on her jeans could be. 

They stood, completely still, staring, until the doors began to close again and Kara reached a desperate hand to stop them. She stormed out, nearly colliding with Lena as she came to stand a few inches away. 

“Lena,” she gasped, and now Lena could see the sweat that made her hair clink to her face, in droplets going down her temples. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. And you know what? The thing is, I... I love you.”

Lena felt about to faint. This wasn’t real. This couldn’t be happening. “What?”

“I love you,” Kara repeated through a ragged breath, as if that explained everything. Lena took a step back. 

“How do you expect me to respond to this?”

Kara faltered. “How about... you love me, too?”

Lena drew a sharp breath, and it came out as a hiss. “How about, I’m  _ leaving.” _

She turned to walk off, going back through the crowd, parting it with some difficulty as Kara followed her like a golden retriever. 

“Doesn’t what I said mean anything to you?”

Lena bit back a retort—around her, revelers began the countdown to midnight. She finally broke free of the crowd, finding a free pocket of space in a hallway. Confetti flew in every direction, and all around them, people kissed and broke into song. She turned to face Kara, tears burning in her eyes. 

“What the  _ fuck  _ is that supposed to mean?? I’m sorry, Kara. I know it’s New Year’s Eve and I know you’re feeling lonely, but you can’t--you can’t just show up here and tell me... tell me you  _ love  _ me and expect that to make it all better.” She threw a hand in the air, gesturing between them. “I mean, what I am supposed to say?? Great, Kara, you love me. That settles  _ everything,  _ now we can waltz into the sunset together? It doesn’t work that way!”

Kara paused. “Well, how  _ does  _ it work?”

“I don’t know!” Lena cried. “But not this way.”

There was a beat, and Kara looked like she was either about to run or kiss her.

“How about this way,” she said, stepping  closer . “I love how you get cold when it’s 65 degrees out. I love the dimples you get—on both  cheeks! — when you smile. I love how it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love how you fidget with your hands when you’re around me and you’re nervous. I even loved when you used my jacket for a  Kleenex . I love it that after spending the day with you I can still smell your stupidly expensive perfume on my clothes. I love how you’re the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. Lena, it took me eleven years to figure this out. And I ran here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, you want the rest of your life to start  as soon as possible!”

Lena opened her mouth, then closed it again. Tears were streaming down her cheeks now. Damn this woman.

“See, that’s  _ just like you,  _ Kara!” She pressed a furious finger to Kara’s chest. “You come here and say things like that, and you make it  _ impossible  _ for me to hate you--”

Kara stepped forward. “--and I  _ hate  _ you, Kara, I hate that you’re the one who messes with my heart like this.”

She was truly sobbing now, but when Kara put her arms around her, Lena didn’t recoil. Their comfort, their warmth—even through that denim jacket that was still cold from the wind outside—it all felt like home. 

And when Kara leaned in, hesitating, Lena had to all but grab her face in her hands to bring her closer, to brush their lips together, because she felt like that would be the only way to stop crying, and the way the lights twinkled in her blue eyes made Lena see how she was also about to cry, and Lena really, really,  _ really  _ didn’t want that as much as she hated her. 

And at the first touch of their lips Lena remembered how much she loved how Kara was  _ always  _ eating some kind of treat, how that stain on her jeans was most likely ice-cream, how Kara could not stand silence and thus always had some crazy, morbid, or plain ridiculous observation to the most mundane event, how she was strong enough to haul that stupid Christmas tree, how she always rested her head on Lena’s shoulder on movie nights. She loved Kara Danvers. And Kara Danvers loved her. 

They broke apart after an eternity, and Auld Lang Syne went on around them, and of course Kara chose that particular thing to fixate on—just how Lena loved it.

“My whole life I’ve never really known what this song means,” she whispered, brows furrowed. Lena laughed. 

“I know what you mean.”

“I mean, should old acquaintance be forgot. So, does that mean we  _ should  _ forget old acquaintances, or does it mean if we do happen to forget them, we should remember them—which is not possible because we already forgot them in the first place--”

Lena silenced her with a kiss. “Maybe you’re just supposed to remember you forgot them, or something.”

They began to sway together, and Kara was leaning in again. “Anyway. It’s about old friends.”

* * *

_ Five Years Later _

_ “ _ The first time we met, we hated each other.”

Lena laughed, leaning into Kara on the couch. 

“You didn’t hate me, I hated you.”

There was a beat and a laugh; the reporter from  _ Time  _ magazine laughed with them.

Lena leveled Kara with a knowing look. “The second time we met, she didn’t even remember me.”

“Did too! I totally remembered you.” Kara protested. “The third time we met, we became friends.”

Lena nodded, taking Kara’s hand in her own. “We were friends for a long time.”

“And then we weren’t.”

“And then we fell in love.”

Kara smiled, clearly reminiscing; the reporter scribbled something on her notepad. “Two months later,” Kara quipped, “we got married!”

“It was a beautiful wedding.” Lena continued, not even looking at the reporter anymore. 

“Yeah. We had this  _ incredible  _ cake—four tiers! Four!”

“With a very rich chocolate sauce  _ on the side...” _

Kara nodded along, and Lena couldn’t stop smiling if she tried. “Yeah, of course. Because, you know, not everybody likes sauce right on top of the cake. There might be too much, or too little, or, you know, it can make the cake all soggy! And there’s a difference between a moist cake and a soggy cake, and trust me, no one wants soggy cake, and of course we didn’t want... What, is there something on my face?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And ta-da! It's done! Thanks for reading and going on my first Supergirl fic journey with me :D

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so glad my nearly encyclopedic knowledge of this movie's script was useful for something, even if it is to post more of my gay writing in the world. Especially so. Tune in next week for the next chapter, if you feel so inclined!


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